So, I have been pining after one of my best male friends for 3 years, when we met we liked each other and it looked like there was the potential there to become a relationship. But that was 3 years ago.

He's said on two or three occasions that he doesn't have time to be the man I need or want, that he loves spending time with me but he isn't in that place yet. Yet. Implying that he will be. But I've wasted 3 years holding on, and I cant do it anymore. I don't know why, but I cant wait around for him. And recently every time I've tried to move on, He's pulled me back in. He's kissed me, or said something that's made me forget about moving on.

This is going to be tough and I know it will be, He knows how I feel yet he's never told me to my face how he feels about me, and thats why I cant do this anymore. I dont want to be here in 10 years time still waiting. If I let him go, and it's meant to be, it'll be right?

I need time to grieve, I need my friends to let me be alone. Which I know they've been reluctant to do because the past few months I've been slipping into depression, and they're trying to be good friends. This to me is the end of an emotional relationship, for 3 years my heart has belonged to him, and a part of it always will, but i have to let go.

I have to be strong and stand up for myself, and move on.