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    What is my path? *newb alert*

    Forgive me. Whilst paganism has always been in my heart, and I have led a spiritual life, I never really pursued or aligned myself with any 'faith' until recently. I've read books, countless internet websites, and yet it all seems so rigid and doesn't really correlate to how I feel about my views and beliefs.

    I'm hoping, as you're all far more educated in these matters, that you can help me find out what the 'term' is for my path.

    I am:
    psychic
    medium
    healer (of sorts)

    I believe in:
    nature
    energy
    that energy can be manipulated and is an unseen force
    that 'God' is Mother Nature and everything is One and we are all strands of the same energy
    karma
    reincarnation
    divination
    spirits
    green witchcraft

    For ages, I associated myself more with Buddhism, because of the absence of a God and I truly respect and agree with the Noble Eightfold path.
    But even then, I still believe in grounding, energy, spirits, felt a strong pull to the moon, celebrated Samhain etc.
    I've been told many things by wiccans, witches about who I am, but one that stayed with me is that the Goddess is on my side.

    What changed all of this is that years ago, I was unhappy, and I was meditating (like I love to) in the sea. For the first time ever, I asked for the karma to be sent back to the people that wronged me, if it was fair and they deserved it, and for the first time in my life I felt someone listening to me. I'd never experienced it before. The only name I can call 'it' is Mother.

    What troubles me is all of this relating worship to Gods and Goddesses and seemingly putting gender on deities. I don't believe in gender. I believe in my Mother, (I have yet to feel a connection a 'Father') but everything I read is all about the Lady and the Lord, Gods and Goddesses and i cannot truly connect when I feel like i don't belong if I don't acknowledge the male and female.

    Can anyone help me? Tell me what sort of path this is considered? Recommend any books?

    Thank you in advance for taking the time out to help me.

    #2
    Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

    Nope, can't help you, but you sound quite sane and I'd be glad to know you. I always sort of made my own path. You may be too young to remember the Carlin bit about that -- how it is harder because you have to hold down the grass all by yourself as you go ....

    Metaphor aside there is the additional vexation of people not knowing what you are talking about, but that's a good excuse to shut up, which is usually not a bad idea anyway -- at least in my case.

    "No, no, you're not thinking; you're just being logical." -- Niels Bohr

    Comment


      #3
      Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

      I do have something to say on the matter, but I have to rush off to the gym for a class, so if you don't mind the wait...

      Welcome to the Forum, by the way!


      Mostly art.

      Comment


        #4
        Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

        Originally posted by ASJ View Post
        Forgive me. Whilst paganism has always been in my heart, and I have led a spiritual life, I never really pursued or aligned myself with any 'faith' until recently. I've read books, countless internet websites, and yet it all seems so rigid and doesn't really correlate to how I feel about my views and beliefs.

        I'm hoping, as you're all far more educated in these matters, that you can help me find out what the 'term' is for my path.
        It's my personal opinion that a name isn't a necessity. To some, it is, and they call themselves "soft polytheistic pagan with buddhist influences" or some such. Not knocking the idea, for some it's a need, and I can relate to that. For years, I searched for a term. Just calling myself "Pagan" doesn't exactly work, because people think I have beliefs that I don't have. I'm definitely not Wiccan, though, nor Heathen, nor Reconstructionist (though, I get a literary hard-on for pre-Christian history). I have Buddhist and Hindi leanings, but I'm not so widespread as to call myself "Eclectic". Eventually, I realized I just didn't need a title. Someone asks, and I have to give an answer, I say I'm a pagan. Or a nature worshipper, but that just makes me sound like some esoteric hippie crazy person. Usually, people don't ask, and I don't tell, and I live safely inside my nameless bubble of sanctity.

        Originally posted by ASJ View Post
        I am:
        psychic
        medium
        healer (of sorts)

        I believe in:
        nature
        energy
        that energy can be manipulated and is an unseen force
        that 'God' is Mother Nature and everything is One and we are all strands of the same energy
        karma
        reincarnation
        divination
        spirits
        green witchcraft

        For ages, I associated myself more with Buddhism, because of the absence of a God and I truly respect and agree with the Noble Eightfold path.
        But even then, I still believe in grounding, energy, spirits, felt a strong pull to the moon, celebrated Samhain etc.
        I've been told many things by wiccans, witches about who I am, but one that stayed with me is that the Goddess is on my side.

        What changed all of this is that years ago, I was unhappy, and I was meditating (like I love to) in the sea. For the first time ever, I asked for the karma to be sent back to the people that wronged me, if it was fair and they deserved it, and for the first time in my life I felt someone listening to me. I'd never experienced it before. The only name I can call 'it' is Mother.
        Back to that whole naming thing. It's usually a deeply personal thing, and lots of people can tell you lots of things. Like me! Keep in mind, these are just my two cents, and I wouldn't claim to be 'wise in the ways of witchery' or anything. I just do my thing.

        You don't need gods to be pagan. I'm pagan, I don't believe in gods. At least not in the "Zeus is almighty and will smite you" way. And there's a whole discussion somewhere on this forum about the different types of deity worship. You can be hard polytheist, soft polytheist, deist, non-deist, pantheist, panENtheist, etc etc. I think, if you wanted the most umbrella term, I'd just call you a witch. You dabble in mediumship, divination, believe in green witchcraft (maybe you want to look into hedgewitchery/kitchen witchery?)

        Originally posted by ASJ View Post

        What troubles me is all of this relating worship to Gods and Goddesses and seemingly putting gender on deities. I don't believe in gender. I believe in my Mother, (I have yet to feel a connection a 'Father') but everything I read is all about the Lady and the Lord, Gods and Goddesses and i cannot truly connect when I feel like i don't belong if I don't acknowledge the male and female.
        This duality thing, in relation to Lady and Lord, one God and one Goddess, that's all a bunch of Wiccan theology. Don't believe it? Then you're not Wiccan (someone will argue with me here, I imagine). The gods, deity, the divine, the Great Spirit, the Universe, The Singularity, whatever you call it, doesn't need a gender. It works for some. I like to imagine the gods as males and females, genderfied archetypes that we created to help understand the universe as a whole. Not really necessary, though. Everybody does what works best for them. And you say you believe in the Mother - but yet, that signifies gender-labels. Or do you say Mother to indicate the birthing unit, without specifying gender? Mother as in the creator?

        Originally posted by ASJ View Post

        Can anyone help me? Tell me what sort of path this is considered? Recommend any books?

        Thank you in advance for taking the time out to help me.
        Not pagan, but I've got some awesome buddhist books you should check out, since that's your thing. Ever heard of Brad Warner? He did a set of four books on zen buddhism, from the point of view of a punk rocker in the 80s discovering buddhism. His books are amazing. The first one is called "Hardcore Zen." They seriously changed my way of thinking when it came to Buddhism (FYI: I spent some time in a buddhist - theravada - monastery in Thailand this winter. I dig buddhism, too.)

        If you're into spells and potions and oils and brews, this book and this book are awesome.

        As for the rest, someone else will have to answer. I tend to stick to books about pre-christian practice, and am very basic in my worship. Light candle, make offering. Light fire, make offering. The odd spell, that's it for me.


        Mostly art.

        Comment


          #5
          Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

          First off, Hello and welcome! It is always nice having new people aboard!
          Second, are you absolutely sure you need a label? I sort of agree with Volcaniclastic on this one in that lbels may not be at all helpful to you. (I personally feel a bit constrained by them.) I did my best for a while to filter out any ideas that didd'nt fit with what I considered at the time to be my label, and it was kind of a dumb move. Things like that can close you off from learning new things. But if you need some sort of classification I can really try to help.

          Originally posted by ASJ View Post
          Forgive me. Whilst paganism has always been in my heart, and I have led a spiritual life, I never really pursued or aligned myself with any 'faith' until recently. I've read books, countless internet websites, and yet it all seems so rigid and doesn't really correlate to how I feel about my views and beliefs.
          This is all ok, If you feel connected to something, it really does'nt matter so much what you call it, Whole piles (piles?) of people here are "spiritual" without being "religious." Not everyone has a pantheon, or specific gods/goddesses, or the lord and lady, or anything like that at all. Everything is what it is and is going to stay that way regardless of what we call it, so if you need a "term" I believe that there is a sticky post regarding "what is a pagan" somewhere and it has manyterms and definitions and explanations stated rather well. It is not all inclusive and does'nt really have to be it is just a start.

          Originally posted by ASJ View Post
          I'm hoping, as you're all far more educated in these matters, that you can help me find out what the 'term' is for my path.
          Eh some people are more educated than others! I am just me, so feel free to disagree with every word I say!

          Originally posted by ASJ View Post
          I am:
          psychic
          medium
          healer (of sorts)

          I believe in:
          nature
          energy
          that energy can be manipulated and is an unseen force
          that 'God' is Mother Nature and everything is One and we are all strands of the same energy
          karma
          reincarnation
          divination
          spirits
          green witchcraft.
          I don't personally see why you could'nt just use the "witch" moniker without the Wicca preface, except that some (maybe not even many) Wicca will tell you that the term witch belongs to them, It has recently become much more ambiguous, and the term witch is moving slowly away from its wicca attachment. I would personally call you a witch by definition, but I am not exceedingly fond of the term itself, so it is a little problematic. If you like it though, have at it!

          Originally posted by ASJ View Post
          For ages, I associated myself more with Buddhism, because of the absence of a God and I truly respect and agree with the Noble Eightfold path.
          But even then, I still believe in grounding, energy, spirits, felt a strong pull to the moon, celebrated Samhain etc.
          I've been told many things by wiccans, witches about who I am, but one that stayed with me is that the Goddess is on my side.

          What changed all of this is that years ago, I was unhappy, and I was meditating (like I love to) in the sea. For the first time ever, I asked for the karma to be sent back to the people that wronged me, if it was fair and they deserved it, and for the first time in my life I felt someone listening to me. I'd never experienced it before. The only name I can call 'it' is Mother.

          What troubles me is all of this relating worship to Gods and Goddesses and seemingly putting gender on deities. I don't believe in gender. I believe in my Mother, (I have yet to feel a connection a 'Father') but everything I read is all about the Lady and the Lord, Gods and Goddesses and i cannot truly connect when I feel like i don't belong if I don't acknowledge the male and female.

          Can anyone help me? Tell me what sort of path this is considered? Recommend any books?

          Thank you in advance for taking the time out to help me.
          There is no reason you can not connect with deity as genderless and frankly ambiguous. If you don't have a name for it mother is certainly fine, although in itself kind of gendered... I think the idea of acknowleging both male and female is supposed to keep you from forgetting one in favor of the other, and I have heard it described as 2 halves of the same thing (i.e. deity.) A coin is a coin but you can only see one side at a time, sort of thing? For instance alot of people associate nature with the feminine, but nature is everything, both male and female- good and evil- Gentle and fierce. So your view is not a bad one, it just needs perhaps a bit of grounding.


          on a side note, my reply looks longer than it is, I hope I diddn't scare you away!
          http://catcrowsnow.blogspot.com/

          But they were doughnuts of darkness. Evil damned doughnuts, tainted by the spawn of darkness.... Which could obviously only be redeemed by passing through the fiery inferno of my digestive tract.
          ~Jim Butcher

          Comment


            #6
            Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

            Originally posted by ASJ View Post
            Forgive me. Whilst paganism has always been in my heart, and I have led a spiritual life, I never really pursued or aligned myself with any 'faith' until recently. I've read books, countless internet websites, and yet it all seems so rigid and doesn't really correlate to how I feel about my views and beliefs.

            I'm hoping, as you're all far more educated in these matters, that you can help me find out what the 'term' is for my path.

            I am:
            psychic
            medium
            healer (of sorts)

            I believe in:
            nature
            energy
            that energy can be manipulated and is an unseen force
            that 'God' is Mother Nature and everything is One and we are all strands of the same energy
            karma
            reincarnation
            divination
            spirits
            green witchcraft

            For ages, I associated myself more with Buddhism, because of the absence of a God and I truly respect and agree with the Noble Eightfold path.
            But even then, I still believe in grounding, energy, spirits, felt a strong pull to the moon, celebrated Samhain etc.
            I've been told many things by wiccans, witches about who I am, but one that stayed with me is that the Goddess is on my side.

            What changed all of this is that years ago, I was unhappy, and I was meditating (like I love to) in the sea. For the first time ever, I asked for the karma to be sent back to the people that wronged me, if it was fair and they deserved it, and for the first time in my life I felt someone listening to me. I'd never experienced it before. The only name I can call 'it' is Mother.

            What troubles me is all of this relating worship to Gods and Goddesses and seemingly putting gender on deities. I don't believe in gender. I believe in my Mother, (I have yet to feel a connection a 'Father') but everything I read is all about the Lady and the Lord, Gods and Goddesses and i cannot truly connect when I feel like i don't belong if I don't acknowledge the male and female.

            Can anyone help me? Tell me what sort of path this is considered? Recommend any books?

            Thank you in advance for taking the time out to help me.
            I think all I can tell you for certain is that you're a Pagan. I think you have to find your own label if you want one. Can I ask, how do you practice your religion? Because what you do is almost as relevant as what you believe when naming your path.

            Comment


              #7
              Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

              Wow, thank you everyone for responding.

              Volcaniclastic - FANTASTIC. Really, really appreciate the recommendations. Thailand is somewhere I really want to go to and also, one of my dreams is to spend some time in a monastery. I'd really love to hear about your experiences. Also, I actually have the Cunningham book, but will definitely check out the other two.

              Ndby - thank you very much. I really like that metaphor and yes, I think I am too young, or maybe just blissfully unaware? You definitely sound interesting, and I mean that in a complimentary way. =)

              AL!CE - I don't really practise per se. I do love candle magic, and feel very at home with green witchcraft (herbs, stones, plants). I feel a pull towards creating 'potions' to drink, and even food to eat. But I also like to meditate on my wishes, visualise and cast my energy out into the open. Other than that, the closet I get to practising is in my behaviour as an individual. What I believe in means I live it everyday and it's all I am, and anything spell-related are just extra wants and wishes.

              It's not that I want a label. In fact I don't believe in definitions for lots of things, but y'know, everything says to read, read, read, but how can I read something and practise anything that's all about Gods and Goddesses? All of these rituals, creating a circle etc. all of it involves deities and I've not come across anything - thus far - that doesn't reference that. And it makes me feel kinda disrespectful, like a fraud, and as if i'm not doing what I should be, I guess.

              Also, regarding energy and 'mother', it's odd and this is why I was curious as to there being any labels for it, because I've never experienced something 'divine' like that. I didn't name the connection, it's merely what came to me - as in Mother, the creator, and all. I've never felt a connection to anything I would consider 'male' and I see plenty of things in life that exist without male/female.
              What gets me is that this experience was completely different to connecting with energy and all around me. It was very much like 'something' heard my wishes, and well, the karma went back to those people pretty fast. I've never related to anything other than energy in my life, to feel something somewhat personified is confusing and life-changing.

              Thank you, all of you, for taking the time out to respond to me and enlighten me. It's definitely reassuring. Any further recommendations on pagan books without ref to deities would be grand!

              Comment


                #8
                Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

                I think Hedge Witch would work as a title for your path. Sorry to any Hedge Witches who disagree. Don't worry that you're not into any particular God or Goddess. You seem to be all about Mother Nature and whilst she can be thought of as a Goddess you don't have to personify her if you don't want to. Some Pagans are very into this God or that Goddess but others are much more about nature, the spirits of the rocks and the trees and so on. I think we personify the divine to understand her/him/it better but in its pure state it's not a God or a Goddess it's something that we can't as humans fully understand. Named Gods and Goddesses are where human thought meets divine purpose but that purpose that energy is something beyond those personifications.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

                  I'm gonna echo the general point that names and titles aren't vital. As you travel, you'll either find a name that fits or make one if you need to. I flip back and forth between insane and Jedi based on whatever entertains me while I'm on the forum and the universe in general lives with it.
                  life itself was a lightsaber in his hands; even in the face of treachery and death and hopes gone cold, he burned like a candle in the darkness. Like a star shining in the black eternity of space.

                  Yoda: Dark Rendezvous

                  "But those men who know anything at all about the Light also know that there is a fierceness to its power, like the bare sword of the law, or the white burning of the sun." Suddenly his voice sounded to Will very strong, and very Welsh. "At the very heart, that is. Other things, like humanity, and mercy, and charity, that most good men hold more precious than all else, they do not come first for the Light. Oh, sometimes they are there; often, indeed. But in the very long run the concern of you people is with the absolute good, ahead of all else..."

                  John Rowlands, The Grey King by Susan Cooper

                  "You come from the Lord Adam and the Lady Eve", said Aslan. "And that is both honour enough to erect the head of the poorest beggar, and shame enough to bow the shoulders of the greatest emperor on earth; be content."

                  Aslan, Prince Caspian by CS Lewis


                  Comment


                    #10
                    Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

                    As far as book reccomendations without refrences to gods, there are a few, but it is a very few that I can think of and many of them focus on a path you don't appear to really have any interest in, (at least it isn't on your list.) but far be it for me to limit you. I will have to check on a few when I get home, I'm sorry but most of my posting is done while I am at work -->go figure.
                    If I can just say one other thing,it is ok to read things that you don't feel fit you. I read plenty of books by authors that ascribe to a fairly (what I would consider) wiccan philosophy. I do not. the god and goddess/ Lord and Lady, they just don't fit who I am right now. There are other bits I just find I don't do or use or whatever. I do not cast circles, I don't call the corners, and while I have a belief in the divine. when I do an energy working I do not feel it is my place to call upon the divine to assist. That does not make some of the points in these books any less valid. I just don't tend to use their pre-built rituals. Many other suggestions are still valid. I think that there a few good books on kitchen witchery which, again I have at home, and they tend to keep the lovely philosophy that you can be a kitchen witch with or without an accepted precreated pantheon of gods. Much of what is done is acknowledge the existance of deity and thank deity, without the need to specify a name or gender or other designation. (In your case "mother" being the applicable deific term.) I think you could find some interesting books in hedge witchery, but keep in mind that there is an aspect of hedge witchery (a rather large on in fact) that hinges on trancework and shamanic journeying, which you may or may not have any interest in. I know I know another way too long post from me! I'm sorry! I hope I at least helped a little though!
                    http://catcrowsnow.blogspot.com/

                    But they were doughnuts of darkness. Evil damned doughnuts, tainted by the spawn of darkness.... Which could obviously only be redeemed by passing through the fiery inferno of my digestive tract.
                    ~Jim Butcher

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Re: What is my path? *newb alert*

                      Originally posted by Maria de Luna View Post
                      I think that there a few good books on kitchen witchery which, again I have at home, and they tend to keep the lovely philosophy that you can be a kitchen witch with or without an accepted precreated pantheon of gods. Much of what is done is acknowledge the existance of deity and thank deity, without the need to specify a name or gender or other designation. (In your case "mother" being the applicable deific term.) I think you could find some interesting books in hedge witchery, but keep in mind that there is an aspect of hedge witchery (a rather large on in fact) that hinges on trancework and shamanic journeying, which you may or may not have any interest in. I know I know another way too long post from me! I'm sorry! I hope I at least helped a little though!
                      I'd really appreciate your recommendations, thank you.
                      I've always wanted to pursue Shamanism but it never quite fit completely, tho' this is starting to sound perfect, actually.

                      You definitely don't need to apologise - you're being absolutely fantastic and are a great help to me, so thank you.

                      Comment

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