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neráida
29 Dec 2016, 11:36
I wasn't sure where to put this, but this seems like a good enough spot...I guess it could go in parenting too, but I'm more interested in the ritual aspect.

Has anyone here ever participated into a coming of age ceremony? My kids have a little while to go, but its something that I've been thinking about. Western culture doesn't seem to do a very good job with this, and I'm looking for a way to mark the different milestones of their life. If you have, what was the ceremony or ritual like? If you haven't, do you have any ideas of what might have interested you? What about any differences for genders? Do you think menarche should be a milestone for girls?

Heka
30 Dec 2016, 02:04
I'm all for celebrating menarche, I want my daughter/s to feel that menstruation is a positive thing, even if it can be a nuisance

Hawkfeathers
30 Dec 2016, 12:31
I celebrated menopause - I celebrate it every day! So happy to be rid of that horrible ordeal.

thalassa
31 Dec 2016, 13:00
...I bought Phee her first (sports) bra. Quelle horreur.

Heka
31 Dec 2016, 14:00
...I bought Phee her first (sports) bra. Quelle horreur.

My mother refused to buy me a bra. But I got teased at school, so my girlfriends went out with me to get one. I hid it in my school bag and only put it on when I got to school. My period came over a year later.

volcaniclastic
31 Dec 2016, 16:50
...I bought Phee her first (sports) bra. Quelle horreur.

Jesus, how old is she now?

thalassa
02 Jan 2017, 18:53
Jesus, how old is she now?

Almost 10...she doesn't need a bra for size, but for active kid+chafing and breast buds. So, sports bra for running and gymnastics and such. She's the one that wanted one. You should have seen the look on Hubby's face...I thought he was going to cry.

Heka
02 Jan 2017, 21:08
Almost 10...she doesn't need a bra for size, but for active kid+chafing and breast buds. So, sports bra for running and gymnastics and such. She's the one that wanted one. You should have seen the look on Hubby's face...I thought he was going to cry.

Golly, I was 12 at least

thalassa
03 Jan 2017, 17:41
Golly, I was 12 at least

I was 10 when I started wearing a bra & 9 when I had my 1st period, so she's gotten a little reprieve from genetics.

Heka
04 Jan 2017, 04:15
I was 10 when I started wearing a bra & 9 when I had my 1st period, so she's gotten a little reprieve from genetics.

Dang. 12 and 14 here

neráida
04 Jan 2017, 08:45
Maybe the proper ceremony would be a day at the spa. ;)

GypsySeaWitch
04 Jan 2017, 13:15
I have never been apart of any coming of age ritual but have day dreamed many times about what I'd like to do with my future kids. I ended up with a son and I plan to do something with him that involves being in the woods. Similar to all those native american stories of becoming a man by being sent into the woods....blah blah blah. So the modern version would be camping? lol. I'm sure we will add in a ritual concept somewhere and I will most likely wing it....taken I'm allowed to actually be the one to do it since it is more a guy thing. Immortal_Dragon might decide different being more Norse oriented than me. I guess we'll figure it out when our son gets older. We got several years to decide since Jacob is only 2 yr old.

volcaniclastic
04 Jan 2017, 17:58
Dang. 12 and 14 here

Fourteen?! You lucky late bloomer. I was 10 for a bra, 11 for menstruation. I was the first kid in the changeroom who needed to wear a bra in my grade. Because kids in the 90s were assholes, this meant that my gym strip found it's way into a toilet on more than one occasion. ...but seriously though. I don't understand bullying. I got picked on SO HARD for needing a sports bra at 10, and then when I turned 11 and got my period, I was called a slut.

I didn't even like boys at that age!

Heka
05 Jan 2017, 04:21
Fourteen?! You lucky late bloomer. I was 10 for a bra, 11 for menstruation. I was the first kid in the changeroom who needed to wear a bra in my grade. Because kids in the 90s were assholes, this meant that my gym strip found it's way into a toilet on more than one occasion. ...but seriously though. I don't understand bullying. I got picked on SO HARD for needing a sports bra at 10, and then when I turned 11 and got my period, I was called a slut.

I didn't even like boys at that age!

That shit f***s me off. Royally. Kids like that in my care get logic shoved down their throats very quickly.