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Red Fish
27 Nov 2018, 10:28
Hello! I don't really know how to label myself but I am a pagan. I have tried to avoid thinking about my experiences for a long time while believing that I am just mentally ill. I am 30 years old and I have been experiencing "weirdness" for a long time. My brain has been scanned. I have tried therapy, medications, and all that but I still see, feel and hear things I shouldn't. Others have seen those things too.

It's getting too hard to explain everything "rationally". I have experimented with energy manipulation, healing, divination, shamanic journeying and herbal magic and it seems to work. This is a part of me and I can accept it now. It's not an illness.

I feel free and much happier now. I set a simple altar for the first time and started writing about my experiences. It's been... emotional. And it's odd and liberating to read other peoples' stories and experiences that are similar to mine in quite specific ways. I also keep remembering things I had forgotten.

I have researched local ancient paganism a bit too and a lot of it makes sense to me. My grandma also has talked about those things. She would say she is a christian if somebody asked but she also has a "house elf" and it doesn't end there...

I don't follow any tradition and I think I never will. I do my own thing and a lot of it has been shown to me by someone from "other realms" when I needed help or guidance.

anunitu
27 Nov 2018, 11:12
welcome red fish, I think you will find we are open here,and ask,some of us may help answer things you might have pondered a while

Red Fish
27 Nov 2018, 11:51
anunitu, thank you! There are a lot of things I am really confused about and it's nice to have people to talk to about these things. Everyone in real life would think I finally lost it once and for all. Ecxept my grandma but she lives far from here and we both have hearing issues on the phone.

B. de Corbin
27 Nov 2018, 12:51
Hullooo, Redfish!

I look forward to conversation - welcome!

anubisa
27 Nov 2018, 16:56
Welcome to the forum! We're always looking for conversations! :)

Juniper
27 Nov 2018, 21:39
Hello Redfish! I love the title of your thread here. :D
Welcome to the forum and if you have questions please don't hesitate to ask.

CrowSpider
27 Nov 2018, 23:39
Welcome to the forum, Red Fish. I'm also a newbie here.

The people here seem friendly. Just watch out for drooling people following you who carry cutlery. heheh

Red Fish
28 Nov 2018, 00:16
Thank you, everybody! I thought I should title this in a way that could possibly make someone smile a bit.

CrowSpider, hello there fellow newbie! I have the ultimate weapon against anybody. Drooling people with cutlery or crowds with pitchforks included. It's called a soprano recorder. When I start playing Yellow Submarine everyone flees. It can be a nice instrument but also a serious torture device. :creepy:

anunitu
28 Nov 2018, 04:13
now you triggered my very old brain,and i carry a youtube.

https://youtu.be/vefJAtG-ZKI,,but no cutlery or drooling.

- - - Updated - - -

this might also fit the thread.

https://youtu.be/VaBPY78D88g

Red Fish
28 Nov 2018, 05:54
anunitu, I love the movie Yellow Submarine and everything in it. I am too young to be "an original" Beatles fan but basically it was all I listened to when I was younger. We had an old LP player and lots of music. I have also seen sir McCartney live few times.

I have been told that my recorder version of Nowhere Man isn't half bad. I had to learn to keep the blue meanies away. You never know when they will strike! I swear the apple bonkers are here already.

anunitu
28 Nov 2018, 06:31
At first I thought you meant like a tape recorder,then realized you meant the flute like musical item.

Red Fish
28 Nov 2018, 07:52
Oh yes, the block flute. It has a confusing name in English.

It's a nice instrument in right hands.

Torey
29 Nov 2018, 03:19
Welcome to PF, Red Fish. :)

I think you will find that there is a place for everyone here, regardless of your beliefs.

Juniper
29 Nov 2018, 15:26
I played the Block Flute a tiny bit when I was a kid. I don't recall what happened to it or why I didn't pursue it more. It was fun though and to this day, any time I hear someone play it I get nostalgic.