PDA

View Full Version : Wish I leave and be forgotten



pragon
02 Jan 2019, 19:10
I feel we as humans have come farther in life to the point where just as friends seem to leave each other sometimes and relationship doesn't exist anymore... I feel the same should be for family. I mean I got family members I don't even want to be with and im always getting told by other members of the family that I have to be with them and love them because they are family. Screw that!? Why do I need to be any closer to my biological parents? Just because they gave birth to me? What a bunch of CENSORED? Most animals move on. Birds leave the nest and go CENSORED other birds. Yeah I geuss some animals still work in family and packs like wolves but I mean why does every human have to be bound to family? It is stupid to me and irrelevant to evolution. People die.. We get it? Why become close to people and feel pain of dying? Forget it. I know its self centered and I know many not believe in it but hey I do... I just wish I could leave family forever and have them forget me.

volcaniclastic
02 Jan 2019, 23:04
Do not swear on public forums. Failure to comply will result in a temporary ban pending staff discussion.

anunitu
02 Jan 2019, 23:55
again thanks vol.

prometheus
03 Jan 2019, 01:02
A common feature among humans is tight family bonds; a trait we share with some of our mammalian cousins. But everyone is different, there is variation within the population. If you don't feel these kinds of bonds, that's fine. But before you burn bridges i would advise that you wait quite a while to ensure it's not a temporary phase. And if you are set on it then explain it to your family gently - they probably still feel a tight connection to you and will be hurt by your emotional distance.

monsno_leedra
03 Jan 2019, 03:13
Lets be frank here, if you want to leave you can, its up to you depending upon your age. As the family genealogist I run into that all the time, family member's who just vanish. Never to be seen again and I get asked if i've ever found any trace of them. Some go off and die, some go off and change their names, some simply want nothing to do with their biological family or certain parts of it. Heck, some even go out and make new family ties, either through marriage or even via friendships and near adoption into other familial type settings. It's a choice! You make it and you live with the fall out from it.

But to be honest, and based upon all the threads you put up last night I don't think you want any of that. Every thread you posted wasn't about raving against the system. It wasn't about raving against any particular profession though you mention them. Wasn't about raving truly against family. Nope, basically it was all about drawing attention to YOU. It's not even anger really more self pity on your part from the reading. Sort of a woe is me. The standard "It's not my fought!"

Sorry other's might see anger in your postings, to me I simply see deflection and misdirection. Don't look at me look at all the things I am pointing at that is wrong so you don't see me. Were I still in the Navy your post would remind me of one of my young Seaman standing in front of my saying "Chief, it's not my fought it was .........., their all against me!"

pragon
03 Jan 2019, 10:57
But to be honest, and based upon all the threads you put up last night I don't think you want any of that. Every thread you posted wasn't about raving against the system. It wasn't about raving against any particular profession though you mention them. Wasn't about raving truly against family. Nope, basically it was all about drawing attention to YOU. It's not even anger really more self pity on your part from the reading. Sort of a woe is me. The standard "It's not my fought!"

Pragon says: I do want it actually. Wasn't about raving against system? What? Sure it was. I agree it was drawing attention to myself. I want to see what others have to say. Too say I wasn't raving about anything mentioned is pretty ridiculous.


Sorry other's might see anger in your postings, to me I simply see deflection and misdirection. Don't look at me look at all the things I am pointing at that is wrong so you don't see me. Were I still in the Navy your post would remind me of one of my young Seaman standing in front of my saying "Chief, it's not my fought it was .........., their all against me!"[/QUOTE]

Pragon says: Not my fought, not my fought... Ohh please. You don't even know my story so quit acting like you know everything I'm going through. Yes, I have faults. Yes, I have guilt. However, not everything I do in this world is wrong.

Bartmanhomer
03 Jan 2019, 11:05
But to be honest, and based upon all the threads you put up last night I don't think you want any of that. Every thread you posted wasn't about raving against the system. It wasn't about raving against any particular profession though you mention them. Wasn't about raving truly against family. Nope, basically it was all about drawing attention to YOU. It's not even anger really more self pity on your part from the reading. Sort of a woe is me. The standard "It's not my fought!"

Pragon says: I do want it actually. Wasn't about raving against system? What? Sure it was. I agree it was drawing attention to myself. I want to see what others have to say. Too say I wasn't raving about anything mentioned is pretty ridiculous.


Sorry other's might see anger in your postings, to me I simply see deflection and misdirection. Don't look at me look at all the things I am pointing at that is wrong so you don't see me. Were I still in the Navy your post would remind me of one of my young Seaman standing in front of my saying "Chief, it's not my fought it was .........., their all against me!"

Pragon says: Not my fought, not my fought... Ohh please. You don't even know my story so quit acting like you know everything I'm going through. Yes, I have faults. Yes, I have guilt. However, not everything I do in this world is wrong.[/QUOTE]

Pragon. I don't know you very well but it's still like you need some professional help. :(

pragon
03 Jan 2019, 11:49
It's not easy talking about my life to a complete stranger in person.

Shahaku
03 Jan 2019, 12:39
I feel we as humans have come farther in life to the point where just as friends seem to leave each other sometimes and relationship doesn't exist anymore... I feel the same should be for family. I mean I got family members I don't even want to be with and im always getting told by other members of the family that I have to be with them and love them because they are family. Screw that!? Why do I need to be any closer to my biological parents? Just because they gave birth to me? What a bunch of CENSORED? Most animals move on. Birds leave the nest and go CENSORED other birds. Yeah I geuss some animals still work in family and packs like wolves but I mean why does every human have to be bound to family? It is stupid to me and irrelevant to evolution. People die.. We get it? Why become close to people and feel pain of dying? Forget it. I know its self centered and I know many not believe in it but hey I do... I just wish I could leave family forever and have them forget me.

Our family ties are part of what make us human. Coming together as communities is a huge part of what allowed us to become what we are today. I'm not going to tell you you shouldn't cut off contact with family. I'm no contact with my mother and my three brothers. But I have other bonds that have become just as important to me. I have some very strong friendships with people I consider to be family. And sometimes, it's the family you make, not the family you were born into, that you rely on.

Why do we become close to people, even know that they'll die someday? Because, for our mental health, we need contact, even if it's minimal and we're typically introverts. Grief is part of the human experience. Grief is a sign that we formed bonds appropriately.

As far as not want to talk to a total stranger to get help, are you familiar with the therapy process? Typically you have an intake session which is kind of a get to know you. You share the surface stuff, have a conversation with the therapist, learn a little about them too. It helps with that feeling of unloading on a stranger. The other thing is that since they are pretty much a stranger, you can say things to them without restraint, and without worry that you'll hurt their feelings. They are trained not to get emotionally involved.

monsno_leedra
03 Jan 2019, 15:39
But to be honest, and based upon all the threads you put up last night I don't think you want any of that. Every thread you posted wasn't about raving against the system. It wasn't about raving against any particular profession though you mention them. Wasn't about raving truly against family. Nope, basically it was all about drawing attention to YOU. It's not even anger really more self pity on your part from the reading. Sort of a woe is me. The standard "It's not my fought!"

Pragon says: I do want it actually. Wasn't about raving against system? What? Sure it was. I agree it was drawing attention to myself. I want to see what others have to say. Too say I wasn't raving about anything mentioned is pretty ridiculous.


Sorry other's might see anger in your postings, to me I simply see deflection and misdirection. Don't look at me look at all the things I am pointing at that is wrong so you don't see me. Were I still in the Navy your post would remind me of one of my young Seaman standing in front of my saying "Chief, it's not my fought it was .........., their all against me!"

Pragon says: Not my fought, not my fought... Ohh please. You don't even know my story so quit acting like you know everything I'm going through. Yes, I have faults. Yes, I have guilt. However, not everything I do in this world is wrong.

Truthfully I don't have to know your story it's A typical based upon what you've written. For instance I didn't say everything your doing or did is wrong but evidently someone has implied that since you brought it up as a defense. Like I said you come across as the same ole same ole...imply you want people's opinion and advise but I think you only want to hear or in this instance see what supports or agree's with your position or anyone who will commiserate with you.

Here you have an anonymous group of people who basically do not know the real you and have no way to "influence" or "act upon" your real life. Anything you say or reveal could not and realistically can not be used against you in anyway. Even if you presented "Your" situation via a pseudo scenario and asked for advise or opinion about the situations being revealed. But instead you cursing and whining to be the center of attention. Yet then claiming you can't share anything because you feel uneasy talking to strangers about it.

Sorry sounds like my 9 year old twins when they want attention but don't want to really do anything about it.

Bartmanhomer
03 Jan 2019, 16:09
Pragon. I encourage you to get help from a therapist. I know you don't want to hear my mouth but sometimes it's good to get help from someone who knows their expertise for what you're going through.

faye_cat
04 Jan 2019, 17:01
You have to decide if having those people in your life is worth having any stress they cause in your life.

If you want them in your life but you want them to treat you better, be honest and start that dialogue.

If you can't stand them and want them away from you, take steps to remove yourself: physically, if you can, or mentally if you aren't able to leave yet.

Ultimately it's your life, just work towards a life you want. Actively removing yourself from a situation is not the same as hurting someone in a situation.

anubisa
05 Jan 2019, 13:48
Look, I can relate in some ways where you come from. All my close family is Catholic and my brother-in-law is a total asshole at times when we talk about my religion. However, we as humans have the need for closeness, for love, for family. We do share some similarities with animals, especially with wolves and dogs I think. Because they and we have a need that closeness and familial need. We can't have people forget us. Not even in the afterlife. If you want space, let your family know, but don't cut your ties.