11-year-old sister claims she sees and feels spirits | Mom is mad at me?

[KovuTheGirl]

So my 11-year-old sister just informed me that she can sometimes feel and see things that she's assuming are spirits. While I'm a believer of spirits, I'm having trouble believing her because she's been watching youtube videos about ghosts and spirits and mediums cleansing houses, and she has a tendency to not be genuinely interested in stuff/ claim to do things because she sees it online.

She's also claiming that she wants to try witchcraft, but again, I'm convinced she's only interested because of what she sees online and I'm worried she's getting misinformed about what we do.

What's worse, my mom is accusing me of talking about my craft and practices in front of my sister (which, I never have because my parents want her to finish her catechism first, and they don't want me to confuse her any more than she already is), and now I'm under the impression that she's upset with me because I chose a different path than Christianity?

I typically keep my religious views and practices to myself (mostly cause my family is primarily Christian and I don't want to start an argument or have a debate), all of my supplies are kept in my bedroom (because I just recently moved back home due to some financial troubles) and I only practice when I have privacy.

Basically, I'm just looking for either some info, some resources, or just some advice on how to deal with this and ensure that this doesn't end in a huge argument?

[Prickly Pear]

Re: 11-year-old sister claims she sees and feels spirits | Mom is mad at me?

This is a hard one, because you can end up looking like the bad guy no matter what you do. Depending on your parents, I would let your parents know that she is watching those videos and that you think it is a phase. Under the circumstances, I would also respect your parent's wishes and establish boundaries between your personal practices and your family. Since they know about them, you could help establish explicit and specific boundaries. That way you don't have to share anything that you don't want to with your sister, and your parents may feel a little better if you establish yourself as an ally. The problem is that if your sister pushes the issue, your parents may blame you anyway. Waiting for her to finish catechism sounds fairly reasonable- asking her to try things her parent's way, but setting up a measurable endpoint where she gains her autonomy. Many religious parents wouldn't bend that far, I think it is encouraging. My guess is that if your parents are religious, then they are probably at least a little upset that you have chosen a path that is not Christianity. Again, though, it is encouraging that they seem to have been at least somewhat accepting. You just don't want to make your little sister's eternal soul the flash point between you and your parents.

It also sounds like you want to be respectful of your sister's experience, but wonder if her interest in witchcraft may not be well developed or informed. She probably thinks it is though, so some gentleness in approach is probably in order. I would definitely respect her experience, so if she says she sees spirits, then don't tell her she doesn't. I would defer to your parents when she asks these questions. "What do Mom and Dad say about you seeing spirits?"Also, you can plea fear of parental wrath if you don't want to get into it with her. I would probably refrain from doing much more than listening to how she feels about it. After you talk to your parents, you may decide that you will have to refuse to discuss it at all because of their wishes.

If it were me, I might make a list of my concerns and take them to my parents to help set out explicit guidelines.

What do you do if she asks you specific questions?
What do your parents consider dangerous areas related to religion, spirits,witchcraft where they might want you to intervene if you knew she was involved in them? (Internet safety issues come to mind- what if she looks to someone untrustworthy for the information or support?}
Are there areas or situations where it is okay for you to discuss aspects of your belief with her?
Are there areas or practices that you consider private and do not wish to share with other family members whether they want to or not?
Would it be a good idea for your parents to learn more about your practices and beliefs for themselves?

Nothing in your post sounds like abuse or mental illness, but if those are factors my answers would be very different. Otherwise, I'm guessing that an organized, proactive approach where you present yourself as an ally to your parents is your best bet.

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Also, if you ask those questions to your parents, be prepared that you might not like the answers.

[Eleanor]

Re: 11-year-old sister claims she sees and feels spirits | Mom is mad at me?

Like Prickly said, be clear and talk to your parents. Communication is the most important thing when it comes to solving issues between people, especially in close relationships like with your parents and siblings. Sit down with them and ask your parents to what extend they feel you could inform your sister about witchcraft when she asks you about it. In my opinion, it's better she learns it from you than from random sources on the internet.

As for the ghosts, when I was about 16 I was very interested in ghosts and haunted places. The more I got into it, the more ghosts I saw, heard and felt. In the end I had to convince myself that ghosts weren't real in order to deal with the fear that came with it. I couldn't sleep anymore, because every sound I heard and every shadow I saw scared me. Don't deny your sister's believes in ghosts. If she saw one, then she saw one. No arguing there. Just keep an eye out as she develops this interest. If she ever gets scared, tell her that ghosts can never hurt her and she can just tell them to go away and they'll leave her alone. She'll figure this out on her own eventually.