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**anunitu** · 05 Oct 2021, 07:36

Re: I Need Help

i was a 50 year smoker quit using electronic cigs for a month no ritual ,have not drank for over 40 years and now 74
ask if you like

**Corvus** · 05 Oct 2021, 09:05

Re: I Need Help

So here's the thing, it's a real bad idea to incorporate substance use into a plan to avoid substance use. Doing so is just going to make your life more difficult. Any treatment plan is best done complimentary to other treatment, so maybe look for a mental health office specializing in addiction management and utilize them in addition to your spell. Magic does not offer easy solutions and it will not be the fault of a spell of this fails. You want to reduce your access to the source of addiction and any situations or people which would bring you near your source of addiction.

For dealing with addiction onwards it's important to cultivate a supportive environment, that is people and situations which are helpful for avoiding substance use. For example, no parties where use of your substance is standard, at least not until you're further in recovery, and maybe not even then. Surround yourself with encouraging people who won't shame you. Remember to remove yourself from the temptation whenever possible. There is no point after quitting where "using once won't hurt" because it will, any use after you quit is a relapse.

Cognitive behavioral therapy is pretty much the standard therapy now and it involves changing the patterns of thought associated with the problem.
1. Identify what goes through your mind while using. What are the reasons that you specifically use?
2. Having found the cause, look for an alternative that addresses the thought pattern. This will almost certainly be difficult.
2.5 address the thought patterns in cause effect style. So instead of "I need a drink because I'm overwhelmed" think to yourself "I'm overwhelmed. I'll take a moment to calm down and break it down. I can do this if I can make it manageable"
3. Try to develop confidence in your decision and abilities. Know that you can make the right decisions for you and have the strength to stick with them. This would be a great thing to do a ritual for.

This can be done by yourself if you want to give it a try. Start by replacing your craving with some other easy neutral or pleasurable activity that can be easily done. For example, I used to bite my lips constantly so I started carrying around chapstick to use whenever I wanted to bite my lips. I recognized this behavior came from anxiety and having dry lips so I found a different behavior to cope with both. Silly example but same principle. A lot of people try replacing various drugs with snacks, like carrots substituted for cigarettes since they can be a similar shape, but he careful not to just swap additions. The important thing is to map that energy from the substance onto a different thing or activity. It should be something active that you consciously choose to do, not passive like listening to music or watching TV.

In this situation I would focus on a ritual based in strength and confidence. Make yourself the center of the ritual, not the addiction, and do magic to affirm your own power. You have the power over the addiction, it does not have power over you. Leave behind what doesn't serve you anymore, what doesn't make you better. Maybe write down the things you want to leave behind, what holds you back, what has power over you, and what drives you to do self destructive behaviors. Fold up the paper into a teeny tiny bit and see how small all those things are, then burn it and let it go- throw the ashes away somewhere far, in a river if possible, and know that you're leaving what holds you back.

If you do this its very important to follow up with the reverse, write down all the things you love about yourself, what you're proud of, what makes you feel strong and powerful, and what makes you want to be a better person, and keep that with you- maybe put it in your pillow case or incorporate it into a spell sachet with herbs (like cinnamon, black pepper, rose petals, ect) or crystals. Keep it close and let your spell give you confidence in all aspects of your life. Instead of buying yourself weed, maybe try a rose or a bath bomb or something else around the same price that seems like a gift, something to add beauty.

The magic is within you. This little spell is just a reminder of that.

**iris** · 05 Oct 2021, 16:00

Re: I Need Help

Corvus said it well.

Approaching it as a therapist who does work with addiction, I'll say in my experience the "one last time" is never a good idea. It builds up the thing you're trying to quit in your mind. Don't do that to yourself. You'd be better served showing your will to change it by getting rid of it, that's a power move.

I work with hypno therapy. We classify most addictions as habits. Some part of you is so used to doing this thing, it can't fathom not doing it. It needs a new job, something else to focus that energy on, something that allows you the freedom you need to work on yourself.

In addition to corvus. It's important to think about why you want to quit. "Because I should" is rarely enough to keep it up, write it down if you need to, why do you WANT to quit. What do you want out of it.
Something I use is this: sit down and imagine your self a year from now. Sober, clean. What's different then? Are you healthier? What's that thing you want to do that this is keeping you from? What hobbies might you have picked up? What kind of people might come into your life? What could you spend the money you save on substances on?

If there's an underlying issue that caused it in the first place, get help for that if you can. People rarely abuse substances for no reason.

Magic is great for manifesting your will. But the work still has to be done all the same. It's a helping hand, not a solution.

**Hawkfeathers** · 05 Oct 2021, 19:19

Re: I Need Help

When you don't know the last time was the actual LAST time, it makes things easier down the road.

**monsno_leedra** · 06 Oct 2021, 05:29

Re: I Need Help

I think the first thing you need to do is determine if you really want to quit and who your doing it for.

i smoked for years and tried several times to quit. Unfortunately, most often I was trying to quit for everyone but myself and for every reason but actually wanting to quit for myself. So basically failed each time because I was doing it for the wrong reasons. You might say my heart was never in it. Once I decided that I wanted to quit and quit for my self, I just put them down and never touched them again.

As pointed out above the other aspect is habit breaking. You can't break a habit by starting out saying your going to do it one last time. You've already acknowledged and accepted defeat. realistically already implanted the seeds of failure because your not really ready to accept that you want to quit.

One thing I remember, can't say why I remember it, is it takes 21 days to form a new habit or break an old one. To do something for 21 days reprograms the mind and body. But you have to be careful not to replace one negative habit with another. it's like smoking one of the big things was having something in my hands. That hand to mouth movement was part of the conditioning. Environment was another figure if I was in certain places or doing certain things then I was programmed to smoke.

Doing a ritual to have a final smoke or drink at the place you've been doing it is sort of self defeating. Your trying to tell yourself you are going to change while setting up all the conditions to continue and expect to continue. Not to say that you can't if you really have intentions of quitting. But the motivation, psychological and emotional convictions have to be real and desired.

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