Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

[DanieMarie]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

Man, life is risk and sometimes you get murdered. Sucks but that's the shit. I think we have so much of an overreaction in terms of personal safety. All we can do is somewhat mitigate risk through common sense. What are the odds of getting murdered off a dating website? Close to zero.

Mine aren't because I'm insufferable but that is besides the point.

This. You can never 100% avoid risk, but you can apply common sense to reduce it. Sometimes, people still get murdered, but as much as that sucks, there's no way to avoid murder 100%, no matter how many background checks or guns you throw at the situation.

Based on personal experience and the experiences of my friends, most people on online dating sites are nice, normal people who just want to meet someone. Like everyone else, they have flaws, and those flaws may be deal breakers to some people, but that doesn't make them bad people. There are a few creeps, but most of the creeps are of the "try to convince you to go home with them when you said you weren't interested in casual sex" or "show up without money and expect you to pay for the date" or "generally jerky and unpleasant" variety.

Maybe I'm biased because I met the love of my life on the Internet (and on an online dating site, no less). But then again, I met the love of my life on the Internet, so I can tell you first hand that it can be a pleasant experience and that there are great people on online dating sites.

[ThePaganMafia]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

This is why I'm gonna dump online dating. This is the last text I recieved:

"Must be the connotations of spirituality have u confused about what it is then. To me at least . U seem to have a strong aversion to spirituality"

Girl wat

[Hawkfeathers]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

I once was contacted by an evangelical preacher. I told him we had serious religious differences and wished him well. Of course this prompted him to send me all sorts of bible quotes.
I really should write my memoirs.

[ThePaganMafia]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

I can hand evangelicalism. That at least I understand the lingo. I have no idea what this chick is on about.

"Because i am. Im an empath, an intuitive, a witch if u will. I have a knowing and a gift. I heal people w my hands. U will never embrace who i am cuz I'm the embodiment of spirituality."

I guess this thread is now about wierd people on dating sites. Let's get it going.

[Bartmanhomer]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

That's sort of ironic if you think about it. It's ok to list and deny certain groups rights in the name of protection of innocence, even if it only protects a single person. Then go ballistic on others as the collective "You" says it's better to endanger even a single person vice denying a supposed right or recognition to another group.

Figure how can you confirm / deny a persons criminal history when even now there are movement's afoot to make it a denial of civil rights to ask about and / or deny a person a job or home / apartment, etc based on prior convictions as the legal system is unbalanced in the number of people of color in the system. The argument being its racial in application due to that in-balance. Even looking a sex offender listing is suspect for most will look and see a name and go no further yet ignore the multiple levels and degree's of convictions that can get you placed upon such a listing. Then the argument for instances about transgender and public bathrooms, again a rule in favor based upon a slanted ideal even if it means a single child might get abused or worse so long as you afford that right to them.

Is there a resolution to the situation? I really do not know other than being aware. Yet being realistic the odd's of something happening are probably about the same as being injured, raped, killed, etc by someone you already know and believe you are safe around.

Psychologically wise I'd say even your best beliefs and assumptions you can tell a potential aggressor is false given the number of serial killers, rapist, etc have a personality that deceives their victims into allowing them to get close to them.

So you're saying just let the criminals date and have their lovers murdered by them? But wouldn't the online dating community be worried about the types of people that they're interacting or even dating?

[monsno_leedra]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

So you're saying just let the criminals date and have their lovers murdered by them? But wouldn't the online dating community be worried about the types of people that they're interacting or even dating?

Let criminals or potential criminals have their way, Not at all BartmanHomer. I'd rather deny supposed rights to a group than place a single child, young adult or adult in danger to make the others feel better about themselves. And that doesn't just apply to potential murders on some dating site but any situation where the potential is increased to accommodate the sensitivities of some group in my opinion.

[thalassa]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

A private dating website is hardly comparable to a roof over your head and the means to pay for it legally.

[DanieMarie]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

I can hand evangelicalism. That at least I understand the lingo. I have no idea what this chick is on about.

"Because i am. Im an empath, an intuitive, a witch if u will. I have a knowing and a gift. I heal people w my hands. U will never embrace who i am cuz I'm the embodiment of spirituality."

I guess this thread is now about wierd people on dating sites. Let's get it going.

I don't blame you. The writing alone is a deal breaker.

I don't understand why some people message members of the opposite sex when they clearly aren't compatible and then try to change their minds. I got that a lot when I was on online dating. I always said that I was looking for something serious, because that usually helps weed out commitmentphobes and guys who just want a casual thing. I used to be a reasonably attractive woman, so I got a lot of messages along the lines of "do you REALLY want to be in a relationship, or do you want an adventure." Like, yeah buddy, being with you would be so exciting that it would be like an adventure. Where do people get ideas like that?

[B. de Corbin]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

I don't think I could ever take a person seriously who spells "you" or "are" with a single letter while trying to make a good impression.

What would such a person be like when he/she lets his/her hair down?

Deal breaker for me

[DanieMarie]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

I know, right? Totally a deal breaker.

I could tolerate less than perfect grammar, because I used an English-language dating site (OK Cupid isn't translated into other languages, so most people communicate in English there in other countries) and I realize that for a lot of the guys I was talking to, English was their second language. But there's no excuse for substituting numbers for words or single letters for words.

That being said, the fact that OK Cupid is only in English kind of makes it a niche dating site here, and people who are that illiterate don't tend to use it. That was part of the reason I was on there.

[anunitu]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

Things change,used to meet people at church,social functions,through friends. My ex and I met through my Brother.

[DanieMarie]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

Those can still be good ways to meet a significant other. It's just that they don't work for everyone. When I met H, I'd exhausted my social circle. Most of the people I hung out with were couples, and they were friends with other couples. I was the odd "single friend" out. Berlin is also full of transients. It attracts a lot of people who stay here for 6 months to a year and then leave. That's fine if you're also only here short-term and just want a fun fling for your year abroad, but I live here permanently. Big cities aren't very tight knit, so it's hard to just meet someone through a common interest, unfortunately.

But for friends who still live in or close to my hometown, those traditional avenues worked fine for most of them. Most of them met their spouses through friends or at social activities in town. Two of my friends got together a few years ago and got married...they've been friends since they were 8!

[ThePaganMafia]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

I live in a rural State. I don't know anybody here. I work from home. I don't go to bars. Online dating has really helped with meeting people.

[thalassa]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

I met the Hubby when he came to fix my rack on deployment...

Neither of my online dating partners ended up working out, but there was nothing wrong with them as people.

[anunitu]

Re: Reason you Might want to rethink online dating

You "Might" have to explain the term "Rack" to our non seafaring friends Thal...

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BTW,nice "Rack"

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Oh,Behave......

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