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  • Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

    So, those who may have read a bit of my posts know my folks are kinda weird when it comes to my religion (seriously, my mom would lecture me about not doing magic and then teach me candle magic in the next breath). Lately my mom's been really awkward.

    Simply put she has now developed a habit of "accidentally" walking in on my rituals. The issue isn't that she "doesn't know" since I have music playing and there's lots of recitation, not to mention the smell of incense. It's becoming evident from other questions she asks about my beliefs that she is truly curious about it. It isn't really that bad since I'm clothed, nor is there anything truly eventful going on (I guess bathing a statue from an outsider's perspective is eventful?), but it feels invasive just the same. I just don't know how to approach it from there apart from sticking to answering her questions and turning the other way with her peeping.

    I've thought about inviting her, but she was raised Southern Baptist and it does influence how she approaches religions outside of her comfort zone. I know I can't confront her about how it's concerning that she peeps in because it may put her on the defense.

    I'm sure I'm not the only one who has ever gone though this, so some input would be uber helpful.
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  • #2
    Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

    You may just have to bite the bullet & make one of your rituals 'public' - maybe 'accidentally' leave the door open one time.

    My husband is insatiably curious about witchcraft, so I've invited him to watch what I do from time to time (when I'm actually doing 'witchy' stuff, anway - it's been yeeeears). The only thing I've had to make clear to him is that if he's not participating directly, he can't interrupt me to ask questions every 5 minutes - he needs to quietly observe and save his observations til I'm done.

    Generally, once he saw that I wasn't getting naked & pleasuring myself or killing anything (or some bizarre combination of the two), he lost interest in the practices.
    The forum member formerly known as perzephone. Or Perze. I've shed a skin.

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    • #3
      Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

      Originally posted by perzephone View Post
      You may just have to bite the bullet & make one of your rituals 'public' - maybe 'accidentally' leave the door open one time.

      My husband is insatiably curious about witchcraft, so I've invited him to watch what I do from time to time (when I'm actually doing 'witchy' stuff, anway - it's been yeeeears). The only thing I've had to make clear to him is that if he's not participating directly, he can't interrupt me to ask questions every 5 minutes - he needs to quietly observe and save his observations til I'm done.

      Generally, once he saw that I wasn't getting naked & pleasuring myself or killing anything (or some bizarre combination of the two), he lost interest in the practices.
      Deep down I think you're right; I just don't want to admit it yet.

      I suspect her friend isn't much help either. She's the type that insists all pagans perform naked rituals and have blood orgies, etc. etc. I also think it has to do with the mini crisis in faith she's having lately from reading the Bible for the first time.

      Thanks for the advice...I may have to let my cat leave the door open wide as she's wont to do
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      "...leave me curled up in my ball,
      surrounded by plush, downy things,
      ill prepared, but willing,
      to descend."

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      • #4
        Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

        A bit of an update: I've moved my shrine to give her a better vantage point and to where my back isn't turned. So far she hasn't peeked yet, but I'm sure we'll see in the upcoming days.
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        "...leave me curled up in my ball,
        surrounded by plush, downy things,
        ill prepared, but willing,
        to descend."

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        • #5
          Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

          Good luck!
          The forum member formerly known as perzephone. Or Perze. I've shed a skin.

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          • #6
            Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

            I find it best when ever it is going to be an awkward conversation to confront the person and instead of telling the person all of the things "they" did, use "I" statements. I know this sounds really cheesy but it really works. Instead of saying "You walked in on me doing something private." say something like "I sometimes feel uncomfortable performing rituals at home." I don't know her as well as you do of course... this is just some advice I learned from dealing with my relatives.
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            • #7
              Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

              Thank you, Liadan I'll try to keep that in mind should I have to directly confront her.
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              "...leave me curled up in my ball,
              surrounded by plush, downy things,
              ill prepared, but willing,
              to descend."

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              • #8
                Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

                Hows it going anyway babe? Any updates? x
                "You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me"- CS Lewis


                https://www.facebook.com/KimberlyHagenART

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                • #9
                  Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

                  Sadly, no. While the questions are still continuing she hasn't peeked for a while. Then again, I haven't done my daily ritual for a few days to focus on chakra work
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                  "...leave me curled up in my ball,
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                  ill prepared, but willing,
                  to descend."

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                  • #10
                    Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

                    So I thought I'd update everyone with this issue. She hasn't really pried since I moved my shrine, nor has she "accidentally" walked in during recent months. I'm sure the latest addition of a beagle has been a large factor as well as her CNA course that she's too pre-occupied to care about my rituals.

                    In short, I think her curiosity has petered out :\
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                    "...leave me curled up in my ball,
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                    ill prepared, but willing,
                    to descend."

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                    • #11
                      Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

                      Is that a good thing or a bad thing? X
                      "You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me"- CS Lewis


                      https://www.facebook.com/KimberlyHagenART

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                      • #12
                        Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

                        To be honest I have no clue. I have no qualms explaining my beliefs albeit I'm inadequate at times, but I also value my privacy and my time with my gods.
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                        "...leave me curled up in my ball,
                        surrounded by plush, downy things,
                        ill prepared, but willing,
                        to descend."

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                        • #13
                          Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

                          That can be a good thing in it's own way, though. Even if she's not curious anymore, petering out means no drama about it, too.
                          Great Grandmother's Kitchen

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                          • #14
                            Re: Awkward Question Concerning Curious Parents

                            Originally posted by DeseretRose View Post
                            That can be a good thing in it's own way, though. Even if she's not curious anymore, petering out means no drama about it, too.
                            At least for now. The bigger issue is my dad and rituals. He goes insane when he smells incense. But that's a whole different mess of issues.
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                            "...leave me curled up in my ball,
                            surrounded by plush, downy things,
                            ill prepared, but willing,
                            to descend."

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