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Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

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    Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

    My fiance and I have been engaged for a couple of years now and will get married at some point. He is not religious, he actually breaks a sweat just thinking of entering the church!, and I obviously want a pagan style wedding.

    The thing is I do not want to go "all out Pagan" as this is a very conservative small village and as I have said before, Christian so I do not want to be causing offence to anybody.

    I have been trying to read up on Heathen wedding ceremonies but there is not much out there. I like the idea of giving swords and have found a site that has some nice ones for us to use. I also like the idea of handing the rings off the hilt of the swords too, just a bit different.

    I do not think the pagan ceremony would go down very well though and might scare the "older generation" and we are quite shy people so the less we need to say the better!

    We want to hold the service outside in the forest, I have a traditional white wedding dress (because initially we were going to do it in church but we don't really feel that comfortable with that now) and I was thinking of having a registrar perform the service so that it will not be so overwhelming for everyone but to just put in certain things that are more to my beliefs but not too in your face.

    Any ideas people? !!!!

    Blessings xxx
    http://theheathenstudyclub.proboards.com/

    #2
    Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

    My wedding included a handfasting. I think it's mainly Celtic, but they plundered each other. You can plunder ideas!
    ThorSon's milkshake brings all the PF girls to the yard - Volcaniclastic

    RIP

    I have never been across the way
    Seen the desert and the birds
    You cut your hair short
    Like a shush to an insult
    The world had been yelling
    Since the day you were born
    Revolting with anger
    While it smiled like it was cute
    That everything was shit.

    - J. Wylder

    Comment


      #3
      Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

      My friend and his wife did this cool blessing thing (at the end of their very non-denominational wedding), where they listened to a friend play them a funny little tune on the flute (air), drank a toast from a set of wedding glasses (water), lit a "Unity candle" together (fire), and planted a seed together (earth)--each person had something they read/said about what that element had to do with a relationship, and how they hoped they would carry that idea into their marriage. Basically, they told each person/people what element they had, and let them roll with it. I think the only one's they really "helped" with were the water and fire toasts, because those were done by their parents (and chosen because they are fairly traditional in conventional wedding ceremonies), and then the other two were done by the Best Woman and the Gentleman of Honor.

      If I were to get married again (or if we decide to renew our vows) I'd totally do that!
      Wonderful Life: The Burgess Shale and the Nature of HistoryPagan Devotionals, because the wind and the rain is our Bible
      sigpic

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        #4
        Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

        My husband and I worked out a very nice ceremony with a UU pastor that went over very well with the family (and we have some very firm Catholic followers on his side). If you'd like, I can email you an attachment of the ceremony, it's just too long to post it all on here. It was pretty simple really, but we were very careful about the wording of the prayer, etc.
        We are what we are. Nothing more, nothing less. There is good and evil among every kind of people. It's the evil among us who rule now. -Anne Bishop, Daughter of the Blood

        I wondered if he could ever understand that it was a blessing, not a sin, to be graced with more than one love.
        It could be complicated; of course it could be complicated. And it opened one up to the possibility of more pain and loss.
        Still, it was a blessing I would never relinquish. Love, genuine love, was always a cause for joy.
        -Jacqueline Carey, Naamah's Curse

        Service to your fellows is the root of peace.

        Comment


          #5
          Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

          Originally posted by Shahaku View Post
          My husband and I worked out a very nice ceremony with a UU pastor that went over very well with the family (and we have some very firm Catholic followers on his side). If you'd like, I can email you an attachment of the ceremony, it's just too long to post it all on here. It was pretty simple really, but we were very careful about the wording of the prayer, etc.
          that would be great, thank you. I have just though of another problem we will have and I do not know how to get around it. From my side of the family they only speak English, my fiance,his mum and his aunty speak English, Swedish and Finnish, His grandma only speaks Finnish and everyone else only Swedish.

          HOW WILL I GET THE CEREMONY TO MAKE THEM ALL HAPPY OR EVEN FOR EVERYONE TO UNDERSTAND IT???????
          http://theheathenstudyclub.proboards.com/

          Comment


            #6
            Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

            2 ceremonies? A translator? a silent wedding?
            ThorSon's milkshake brings all the PF girls to the yard - Volcaniclastic

            RIP

            I have never been across the way
            Seen the desert and the birds
            You cut your hair short
            Like a shush to an insult
            The world had been yelling
            Since the day you were born
            Revolting with anger
            While it smiled like it was cute
            That everything was shit.

            - J. Wylder

            Comment


              #7
              Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

              Originally posted by lillywolf View Post
              that would be great, thank you. I have just though of another problem we will have and I do not know how to get around it. From my side of the family they only speak English, my fiance,his mum and his aunty speak English, Swedish and Finnish, His grandma only speaks Finnish and everyone else only Swedish.

              HOW WILL I GET THE CEREMONY TO MAKE THEM ALL HAPPY OR EVEN FOR EVERYONE TO UNDERSTAND IT???????
              Fuck 'em and don't invite 'em. That's how we've planned to do it, should the time come - eloping for the win!


              Mostly art.

              Comment


                #8
                Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

                Originally posted by volcaniclastic View Post
                Fuck 'em and don't invite 'em. That's how we've planned to do it, should the time come - eloping for the win!
                Elope to Kansas. Ahem.
                No one tells the wind which way to blow.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

                  Oh no, they are all lovely people and they are so nice so I want them at my wedding, also what's the point in me spending so much money on a dress if no one sees it? lol
                  http://theheathenstudyclub.proboards.com/

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

                    Originally posted by lillywolf View Post
                    Oh no, they are all lovely people and they are so nice so I want them at my wedding, also what's the point in me spending so much money on a dress if no one sees it? lol
                    To each their own. For me, getting married isn't about anybody damn else - so eloping is the natural option. Will my family be offended? Sure. Do I care? Not really. If they want to feel special, they can go get married, too.

                    But I didn't mean to derail the thread - that's just my option to family members who don't speak English!


                    Mostly art.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

                      Hi!

                      We had a two part wedding, we had our handfasting at stonehenge and then a legal ceremony in Brighton a year later.

                      I started going through our ceremony in this thread here http://www.paganforum.com/showthread...-at-stonehenge

                      We exchanged swords and it worked very well and I think emphasizes that its a partnership of mutual support very well.
                      I also gifted my wife with a set of keys representing access to all that is mine.

                      There are a lot of little things you can add in, and if explained or done well do not really seem "Pagan" as uneducated may think.

                      Sword exchanging and hand fasting with ribbons are fairly "safe" for a lot of people too.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

                        Originally posted by lillywolf View Post
                        that would be great, thank you. I have just though of another problem we will have and I do not know how to get around it. From my side of the family they only speak English, my fiance,his mum and his aunty speak English, Swedish and Finnish, His grandma only speaks Finnish and everyone else only Swedish.

                        HOW WILL I GET THE CEREMONY TO MAKE THEM ALL HAPPY OR EVEN FOR EVERYONE TO UNDERSTAND IT???????
                        As far as the language barrier issue goes: I'd recommend having some sections of your wedding in English and other sections in Finnish and have little bilingual translation booklets printed to accompany them with the sections marked out. It'd probably be rather expensive but custom printing always is.

                        As far as making everyone happy is concerned: don't. Your wedding is about you and your future husband and no one else. If anyone raises any drama about a ceremony that makes you and your fiance happy, I'd recommend that you not feel hesitant to not invite them or, if they make a fuss on the day of your wedding, politely invite them to either please leave or stop attempting to make themselves the center of attention.

                        Aside from that: congratulations on your eventual wedding!
                        Last edited by Unlogisch; 01 Aug 2013, 00:48. Reason: spelling error

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

                          Originally posted by Unlogisch View Post
                          As far as the language barrier issue goes: I'd recommend having some sections of your wedding in English and other sections in Finnish and have little bilingual translation booklets printed to accompany them with the sections marked out. It'd probably be rather expensive but custom printing always is.

                          As far as making everyone happy is concerned: don't. Your wedding is about you and your future husband and no one else. If anyone raises any drama about a ceremony that makes you and your fiance happy, I'd recommend that you not feel hesitant to not invite them or, if they make a fuss on the day of your wedding, politely invite them to either please leave or stop attempting to make themselves the center of attention.

                          Aside from that: congratulations on your eventual wedding!
                          Oh no one has said anything at all, in fact all they know is we will get married at some point in time. There is also no way anyone will put pressure on us, well me, I am very strong willed . I just want everyone to know what the hell is going on because I want them all to "feel" what the ceremony is about.

                          Having translation books is a good idea and seeing how both my fiance and his mum speak English, Swedish and Finnish then we might even do them ourselves, I do want to do as much of it myself as I can so it is nore personal and I am quite arts and crafty (probably not a word but hey)

                          Thanks for that idea xxx
                          http://theheathenstudyclub.proboards.com/

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

                            Originally posted by lillywolf View Post
                            Oh no one has said anything at all, in fact all they know is we will get married at some point in time. There is also no way anyone will put pressure on us, well me, I am very strong willed . I just want everyone to know what the hell is going on because I want them all to "feel" what the ceremony is about.

                            Having translation books is a good idea and seeing how both my fiance and his mum speak English, Swedish and Finnish then we might even do them ourselves, I do want to do as much of it myself as I can so it is nore personal and I am quite arts and crafty (probably not a word but hey)

                            Thanks for that idea xxx
                            You're most welcome!

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Re: Heathen/pagan infused wedding IDEAS PLEASE!!!!!

                              I still think a silent wedding is a good idea......

                              :P
                              ThorSon's milkshake brings all the PF girls to the yard - Volcaniclastic

                              RIP

                              I have never been across the way
                              Seen the desert and the birds
                              You cut your hair short
                              Like a shush to an insult
                              The world had been yelling
                              Since the day you were born
                              Revolting with anger
                              While it smiled like it was cute
                              That everything was shit.

                              - J. Wylder

                              Comment

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