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    Pet Humor

    Got this from a co-worker in my email today (as a response to sending him the cat armor link)


    Note on refrigerator door.



    FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE PETS, THIS IS A TRUE STORY. FOR THOSE THAT DON'T, IT IS A TRUE STORY.

    (At least that’s what it said in the email I received. Anyway it’s funny if you’ve ever owned cats and or dogs.)

    The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door.

    Dear Dogs and Cats: The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food.

    Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

    The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object.

    Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

    I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed.. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort, however.. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

    For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is not required.

    The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

    Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:


    TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:

    (1) They live here. You don't.
    (2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.

    That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.
    (3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
    (4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.

    Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
    (1) eat less,
    (2) don't ask for money all the time,
    (3) are easier to train,
    (4) normally come when called,
    (5) never ask to drive the car,
    (6) don't smoke or drink,
    (7) don't want to wear your
    clothes,
    (8) don't have to buy the latest fashions,
    (9) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and
    (10) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children ...
    Wonderful Life: The Burgess Shale and the Nature of HistoryPagan Devotionals, because the wind and the rain is our Bible
    sigpic

    #2
    Re: Pet Humor

    haha nice!
    ThorSon's milkshake brings all the PF girls to the yard - Volcaniclastic

    RIP

    I have never been across the way
    Seen the desert and the birds
    You cut your hair short
    Like a shush to an insult
    The world had been yelling
    Since the day you were born
    Revolting with anger
    While it smiled like it was cute
    That everything was shit.

    - J. Wylder

    Comment


      #3
      Re: Pet Humor

      Very good!
      My cat asks often for human food, and I keep telling it there is food in its dish filled with special cat food.
      Despite the food arguments, I love it.
      "Fair means that everybody gets what they need. And the only way to get that is to make it happen yourself."



      Since I adore cats, I might write something strange or unusual in my comment.Cats are awesome!!! ^_^

      Comment


        #4
        Re: Pet Humor

        Oh, and don't forget Simon's Cat (my kids LOVE these)







        Wonderful Life: The Burgess Shale and the Nature of HistoryPagan Devotionals, because the wind and the rain is our Bible
        sigpic

        Comment


          #5
          Re: Pet Humor

          Originally posted by thalassa View Post
          Oh, and don't forget Simon's Cat (my kids LOVE these)







          Just like my cat Totally!
          "Fair means that everybody gets what they need. And the only way to get that is to make it happen yourself."



          Since I adore cats, I might write something strange or unusual in my comment.Cats are awesome!!! ^_^

          Comment


            #6
            Re: Pet Humor

            Here be a video playing with my silly old Melody from a few years ago, with kitties Taka and Bat coming for a closer look. I miss that dog so damn much. And the kitties, too, even though they weren't mine.

            Children love and want to be loved and they very much prefer the joy of accomplishment to the triumph of hateful failure. Do not mistake a child for his symptom.
            -Erik Erikson

            Comment


              #7
              Re: Pet Humor

              Depending on where you work, perhps NSFW

              (from the guy that does the "true facts" vids)


              Sad cat diary



              Sad dog diary

              Wonderful Life: The Burgess Shale and the Nature of HistoryPagan Devotionals, because the wind and the rain is our Bible
              sigpic

              Comment


                #8
                Re: Pet Humor

                18 Times Cats Proved That They Are Liquids.
                Army of Darkness: Guardians of the Chat

                Honorary Nord.

                Habbalah Vlogs

                Comment


                  #9
                  Re: Pet Humor

                  555307_531527020203074_1876704363_n.jpg

                  *Horror movie strings*

                  Comment

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