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    #1

    Mentor

    So... I've started the process of looking for a local mentor of the spiritual variety. I've been working on developing daily devotional type work and exploring the possibility of ritual but I'm really feeling the need for some more guidance of the hands-on, local variety. Thing is, I've never done this before. Not sure how it's going to work out and I have a feeling it's not gonna be an easy process.

    Anyone ever done a one-on-one mentoring type thing? Advice? How did you go about looking for someone? I'm not a huge people person... really not. So regular UU attendance just hasn't worked out, it doesn't sit right and it takes a lot out of me being about strangers so much. Don't think I'd sit well in a coven atmosphere either, my views are a little too eclectic for that. Which is why I'm looking into a one-on-one type thing but then that has risks too so... yeah. Just looking to see what kind of experiences we have in the community with this sort of thing.
    We are what we are. Nothing more, nothing less. There is good and evil among every kind of people. It's the evil among us who rule now. -Anne Bishop, Daughter of the Blood

    I wondered if he could ever understand that it was a blessing, not a sin, to be graced with more than one love.
    It could be complicated; of course it could be complicated. And it opened one up to the possibility of more pain and loss.
    Still, it was a blessing I would never relinquish. Love, genuine love, was always a cause for joy.
    -Jacqueline Carey, Naamah's Curse

    Service to your fellows is the root of peace.
    Tags: None
    #2
    I've never done it before, but I have been interested.

    I know that a mentor can't teach you everything, and all the usual problems people have with mentors, but for me its abo it accountability. I'm really bad at making myself do stuff. I need deadlines and reminders haha. So thats why I would want a mentor.

    What about some kind of study group? I dunno, I'm just thinking I'm keen on a study group for runes.
    ThorSon's milkshake brings all the PF girls to the yard - Volcaniclastic

    RIP

    I have never been across the way
    Seen the desert and the birds
    You cut your hair short
    Like a shush to an insult
    The world had been yelling
    Since the day you were born
    Revolting with anger
    While it smiled like it was cute
    That everything was shit.
    - J. Wylder

    Comment

      #3
      Re: Mentor

      I spent years looking for a mentor and was ultimately told that I probably did not need one, an opinion with which I could not agree. I found that it did not need to be some one local, that distance mentoring worked fine for me. In fact, remote mentoring helps to keep the personal aspects of the relationship to a minimum so that the focus remains more on your studies. Your needs might be very different than mine were, but once you are clear in your own mind about what it is you want in your life the odds of finding it are increased exponentially. Whatever it is that you do to clear and focus your attention, do that with this one thing in mind, and then be patient and vigilant. For what its worth.

      "No, no, you're not thinking; you're just being logical." -- Niels Bohr

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        #4
        Re: Mentor

        I have aaalways wanted to find a mentor. Ive never had much luck though. I hope you have an easier time and if you happen to come across a super helpful mentor resource be sure to let me know :P

        Comment

          #5
          Re: Mentor

          When I was 15 I had a mentor. She was a practitioner of Santeria. Oddly she was my nana's cleaning lady and she also ran a botanical shop across from my junior high. I pretty much learned from her doing daily things at my nana's house. I listened a lot. And probably learned more from her actions than her words.

          I don't know how to tell you to find someone. Not in this day and age. Maybe find a shop that sells books on your subject. See who's hanging about. Sometimes just making friends with one person can get you learning a lot from then.
          Satan is my spirit animal

          Comment

            #6
            Originally posted by Medusa View Post
            When I was 15 I had a mentor. She was a practitioner of Santeria. Oddly she was my nana's cleaning lady and she also ran a botanical shop across from my junior high. I pretty much learned from her doing daily things at my nana's house. I listened a lot. And probably learned more from her actions than her words.

            I don't know how to tell you to find someone. Not in this day and age. Maybe find a shop that sells books on your subject. See who's hanging about. Sometimes just making friends with one person can get you learning a lot from then.
            Possibly the only good thing about 'murica, mexican santerian cleaning ladies!!! Haha I want one!
            ThorSon's milkshake brings all the PF girls to the yard - Volcaniclastic

            RIP

            I have never been across the way
            Seen the desert and the birds
            You cut your hair short
            Like a shush to an insult
            The world had been yelling
            Since the day you were born
            Revolting with anger
            While it smiled like it was cute
            That everything was shit.
            - J. Wylder

            Comment

              #7
              Re: Mentor

              I have always wanted one.

              Comment

                #8
                Re: Mentor

                Hey, thanks everyone for getting back on this. Medusa, the main problem is I'm not really the friend type... I've tried the UU and it's not my thing. I might go to some of the bigger gatherings, but I'd feel weird going alone and I don't think my hubby would enjoy it.
                We are what we are. Nothing more, nothing less. There is good and evil among every kind of people. It's the evil among us who rule now. -Anne Bishop, Daughter of the Blood

                I wondered if he could ever understand that it was a blessing, not a sin, to be graced with more than one love.
                It could be complicated; of course it could be complicated. And it opened one up to the possibility of more pain and loss.
                Still, it was a blessing I would never relinquish. Love, genuine love, was always a cause for joy.
                -Jacqueline Carey, Naamah's Curse

                Service to your fellows is the root of peace.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Re: Mentor

                  I started with not so much a mentor, but an old friend with a great deal of experience however, our paths were going in different directs, and we are now just. Be weary, I'm happy to say this site is not overflowing with people feeling qualified to mentor, the same can not be said for other forums.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Re: Mentor

                    Originally posted by Shahaku View Post
                    Hey, thanks everyone for getting back on this. Medusa, the main problem is I'm not really the friend type... I've tried the UU and it's not my thing. I might go to some of the bigger gatherings, but I'd feel weird going alone and I don't think my hubby would enjoy it.
                    ^^ I can relate. Im a solo artist as well. my husband would rather eat a turd than to to an event like that im afraid. he doesnt care what i believe, i just have to keep it out of his face. I have found some wiccan study groups / covens in my area, but, im not exactly wiccan... and i dont know if i would fit into a coven anyway. or if my husband wouldnt threaten divorce if i did lol. u should have seen his face when i brought "Grimoire for the Green Witch" with a big fat pentagram on the cover, to bed with me. I think his exact words were, if you summon a demon, im leaving you... now it was in humor, but just goes to illustrate his lack of knowledge on the subject. that was a couple of years ago and he hasnt exactly changed lol.

                    i dunno about a mentor, but just someone to bs with or bounce ideas off of would be great... kinda how i ended up here. no matter how much i read, and practice, i still worry im doing it wrong!! its not like every ritual is a great success, its trial and error! and serious self evaluation. at least on my end!

                    witchvox i think its called... i found some locals, but i dont have the nerve to contact anyone yet lol. u may have more courage than me tho! may give it a shot if it hasnt already been mentioned =)

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Re: Mentor

                      Originally posted by Shahaku View Post
                      Hey, thanks everyone for getting back on this. Medusa, the main problem is I'm not really the friend type... I've tried the UU and it's not my thing. I might go to some of the bigger gatherings, but I'd feel weird going alone and I don't think my hubby would enjoy it.
                      Yeah, I'm not the friend type either. I think going for someone older helped the friend thing. It's not like I was going to hang out with some elderly lady at the park on a Saturday.

                      I'm thinking finding someone on-line might help. Make it a bit more 'distant' in nature? I don't do gatherings either. But when I do (oh gawd I sound like that XX beer dude!) I find myself offering to volunteer. It gives me something to do and no one questions if I'm alone or note. I haz a role here damnit. Now take that dip and go!
                      Satan is my spirit animal

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Re: Mentor

                        Originally posted by Medusa View Post
                        Yeah, I'm not the friend type either. I think going for someone older helped the friend thing. It's not like I was going to hang out with some elderly lady at the park on a Saturday.

                        I'm thinking finding someone on-line might help. Make it a bit more 'distant' in nature? I don't do gatherings either. But when I do (oh gawd I sound like that XX beer dude!) I find myself offering to volunteer. It gives me something to do and no one questions if I'm alone or note. I haz a role here damnit. Now take that dip and go!
                        Lol i never thought of volunteering bit I'm sure there's always need. If i felt online was enough I'd just ask around here. There's lots of folks if consider mentor worthy. This place has practically been an unofficial mentor for years for me and i love it and appreciate it but i would like some sort of one on one

                        - - - Updated - - -

                        Originally posted by Medusa View Post
                        Yeah, I'm not the friend type either. I think going for someone older helped the friend thing. It's not like I was going to hang out with some elderly lady at the park on a Saturday.

                        I'm thinking finding someone on-line might help. Make it a bit more 'distant' in nature? I don't do gatherings either. But when I do (oh gawd I sound like that XX beer dude!) I find myself offering to volunteer. It gives me something to do and no one questions if I'm alone or note. I haz a role here damnit. Now take that dip and go!
                        Lol i never thought of volunteering bit I'm sure there's always need. If i felt online was enough I'd just ask around here. There's lots of folks if consider mentor worthy. This place has practically been an unofficial mentor for years for me and i love it and appreciate it but i would like some sort of one on one
                        We are what we are. Nothing more, nothing less. There is good and evil among every kind of people. It's the evil among us who rule now. -Anne Bishop, Daughter of the Blood

                        I wondered if he could ever understand that it was a blessing, not a sin, to be graced with more than one love.
                        It could be complicated; of course it could be complicated. And it opened one up to the possibility of more pain and loss.
                        Still, it was a blessing I would never relinquish. Love, genuine love, was always a cause for joy.
                        -Jacqueline Carey, Naamah's Curse

                        Service to your fellows is the root of peace.

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Originally posted by Shahaku View Post


                          Lol i never thought of volunteering bit I'm sure there's always need. If i felt online was enough I'd just ask around here. There's lots of folks if consider mentor worthy. This place has practically been an unofficial mentor for years for me and i love it and appreciate it but i would like some sort of one on one
                          Volunteering s a good idea Medusa

                          But this^^ is how I feel. Ive already picked my mentors too haha
                          ThorSon's milkshake brings all the PF girls to the yard - Volcaniclastic

                          RIP

                          I have never been across the way
                          Seen the desert and the birds
                          You cut your hair short
                          Like a shush to an insult
                          The world had been yelling
                          Since the day you were born
                          Revolting with anger
                          While it smiled like it was cute
                          That everything was shit.
                          - J. Wylder

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Re: Mentor

                            I have never wanted, nor ever had, a mentor. Perhaps my father when I was young. But I have had many people who have taught me many things. And always the most unexpected times, people and places. To be honest, I wouldn't recommend that anyone goes looking for a mentor. Just keep your eyes and ears open for the small snippets that come our way.
                            www.thewolfenhowlepress.com


                            Phantom Turnips never die.... they just get stewed occasionally....

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Originally posted by Tylluan Penry View Post
                              I have never wanted, nor ever had, a mentor. Perhaps my father when I was young. But I have had many people who have taught me many things. And always the most unexpected times, people and places. To be honest, I wouldn't recommend that anyone goes looking for a mentor. Just keep your eyes and ears open for the small snippets that come our way.
                              Then thank the gods for the internet I know I'm but a babe, but I find it difficult to grow out here... could be the heat, lack of rain and crap clay soul though!
                              ThorSon's milkshake brings all the PF girls to the yard - Volcaniclastic

                              RIP

                              I have never been across the way
                              Seen the desert and the birds
                              You cut your hair short
                              Like a shush to an insult
                              The world had been yelling
                              Since the day you were born
                              Revolting with anger
                              While it smiled like it was cute
                              That everything was shit.
                              - J. Wylder

                              Comment

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