should kids swear?

[Maria de Luna]

Re: should kids swear?

It more or less depends on social context (eg. it's quite common for a lot of mostly younger guys here in Aus to use the phrase "c***" as a compliment, as in "X is a sick c***," whereas if they were to go and call their girlfriend a "stupid c***" in an argument, it would be meant, and correctly interpreted, as fairly awful insult).

I don't care if it's considered "normal" right now, if I catch my kid saying that while she is living at home she is getting in a pile of trouble.... I disagree with social context in a certain sense, things that at no longer considered offensive, the word hell for example. The c word (yeah I know, but I do agree that this is not the adult section) is still offensive and not acceptable coming out of a child's mouth. I don't swear in front of children and my parents don't swear in front of me, so I don't see anything hypocritical about the, getting in trouble for it. Maybe it is a thing, if you don't want your kid saying something modify your own behavior, or your husband's, if the kid is around he should watch it... Or just maybe tone it down, be in a different room. Sorry that's the best thought I have.

[Ophidia]

Re: should kids swear?

Furthermore I'm sort of puzzled by many people who think swearing is wrong, but the self same people have no problems using slurs.

These are the only words on my personal off-limits list. My mother & her family were people like that - they would wash kids' mouths out w/soap for saying the mildest profanity, but used racial slurs consistently.

[Willow]

Re: should kids swear?

I've never understood why certain words are so offensive (aside from those commonly known to be racial/gender/special-needs slurs). It also annoys me that it's somehow ok, even expected, for men to use expletives, but not women.

Context is offensive - I'm more concerned with how people use their words than I am with which words they use. You can wound someone to the bone using perfect vocabulary. Besides, the 'f-word' is so useful and universal - it shouldn't be age-restricted.

This is my outlook as well. Cursing has never been a big deal to us, regardless of age.

[anubisa]

Re: should kids swear?

I'm not a parent. However, I was taught to show respect my mother, father, and other people older than me. My grandmother (father's mother) taught us the b-word on accident because she didn't like my mom and still doesn't. You can imagine how angry my mom was when my sister called her the b-word. We get angry and accidentally say bad words in front of children, but we need to be careful and tell children it is not okay. I slip sometimes in front of my now 2-year old nephew and I still have to remind myself that I can't say bad words. It's not okay and we need to teach children that bad words are not a respectful. That's my opinion at least.

[Tylluan Penry]

Re: should kids swear?

Now that the effects of the white spirit and cognac have properly worn off, I wanted to return to this subject.

Who decides what words are bad or good? They are all part of our language and what makes them bad or good is the context in which they are used. Shakespeare used his share of swear words (hence the Bowdlerisation of his works years ago in order to 'clean them up.' ) Are we to prohibit people from using the language as it was intended?

Why is s*** considered a bad word when defecate isn't? Or p*** but not urinate. F*** but not 'break wind.'? It's just playing games with the language.
Worse, with any child worth their salt, it won't work. When I was young my school was extremely strict about when we were allowed to speak. Not in this corridor, not during assembly, nor during prep... so we learned and became very adept at sign language.

When we were banned from using certain words, we looked up their foreign equivalent in the school library. I exclaimed 'putain merde' long before I was allowed to say its English equivalent although it meant exactly the same thing.

Basically I found that allowing my children to swear did not turn them into a bunch of bear swilling navvies. The less I reacted, the less they did it.

I, on the other hand, continued to swear like a trooper.

[thalassa]

Re: should kids swear?

This is my outlook as well. Cursing has never been a big deal to us, regardless of age.

The problem, in my book, is that its not professional in the workplace and its not allowed in school...so its a bad habit to get into at an age where children have poor self control and a lack of refined discernement.

I am not a parent. So my two hundred pessos aren't worth much. I think kids shouldn't swear around others who are not their peers. Or in situations that require you not be swearing. Like dude mr Priest that's some fucking awesome wafer you got there. Yeah. No.

But we all swear among our friends. Swearing is like masturbation. You all do it. But don't be doing it in the living room when your aunt is over for Sunday dinner. Sorta like that.

This^


IMO, its a problem of context.

[Willow]

Re: should kids swear?

The problem, in my book, is that its not professional in the workplace and its not allowed in school...so its a bad habit to get into at an age where children have poor self control and a lack of refined discernement.

This really depends on what school you attend and what kind of work you do. In the US, cursing seems to carry a lot more stigma than anywhere else I've lived. With my relatives, even when they were cursing at 4 years old, they also learned when not to. But it really is the context. My relatives also didn't curse for the shock value, as kids who aren't allowed to curse at home tend to learn toward when they near the age of 10. They didn't curse for the sheer purpose of insult. It's not a stigma for us because it was never treated as one, but we all turned out polite enough (I think).

I'm with Tylluan on this one. They're just words. They become associated with negativity and are used purely negatively because of the stigma attached to them. Grow up in a culture where that stigma doesn't really exist and you will encounter different perceptions and different norms on the matter.

[B. de Corbin]

Re: should kids swear?

Cussing up a storm is something that takes years of work to really master. Dropping the F bomb is so amateur as to be pathetic.

I think an artist should keep his/her work under cover until its worth taking the time to note it as noteworthy.

So, no, I don't think kids should swear, any more than I think they should attempt brain surgery.

Leave it to the pros.

[anunitu]

Re: should kids swear?

I remember when I was in I think 3rd grade,one of the older kids told me to "go home and say Fuc* to your mom,and you will get a surprise" I was a kid,what did I know,yea I said it,and my mom went kinda blank for a second,then went into a rant about NOT saying that word..Never actually saying it herself. She asked where I heard it,and I said from "Name",and she went to the school and had a meeting....kid did not do that again..

So sometimes it really isn't the kids fault.

[Ash Branch]

Re: should kids swear?

Swear words are a normal part of the language, and were once freely used. This is also a class issue, since working class linguistic patterns, including those of children, often include a much freer and more vivid use of swear words.

[Carlin]

Re: should kids swear?

I don't have a problem with it. My son learned that swearing was okay with me as long as it was used sparingly and not in inappropriate situations. His friends all swear far more than he does.