I have just gotten interested in paganism. My beliefs are currently volatile and too often flooded with that detestable thing known as materialism, but the essence of myself is highly spiritual and can be nothing else, thus leading to an internal conflict that is infinitely worse than any physical pain I have ever experienced. I was interested in Christianity as basically the default religion of my culture, but then I realized it just didn't make much sense to me, even though there are some Christians who are respectable and even admirable, and none of the other religions besides different forms of paganism really make a lot of sense either, even though there are parts of them all that I like and/or can agree with. So now I'm just looking for a pantheon, and looking for a god/dess who will call out to me, who will make him/herself unequivocally known to me. I must have so many blessings, but what I do not know is from whom. There are no pagan groups that I know of in my area, so I signed up for this forum.
I'm very interested in spirituality, and I'm trying to learn how to do shamanic drum journeying and other shamanic practices, but the part of me that wonders if they are real keeps holding me back. Outside of spiritual matters, I am interested in language/linguistics (especially German and Germanic languages), music, and philosophy, although they are constantly imbued with spirituality to me. I love reading literature (especially German literature, but I've been looking for things to learn some Old English as well recently) and material about parapsychology and life after death.
So, hello!
I'm very interested in spirituality, and I'm trying to learn how to do shamanic drum journeying and other shamanic practices, but the part of me that wonders if they are real keeps holding me back. Outside of spiritual matters, I am interested in language/linguistics (especially German and Germanic languages), music, and philosophy, although they are constantly imbued with spirituality to me. I love reading literature (especially German literature, but I've been looking for things to learn some Old English as well recently) and material about parapsychology and life after death.
So, hello!
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