Why Do You Care About Someone Else's Appearance?

[DanieMarie]

Re: Why Do You Care About Someone Else's Appearance?

I don't care.

Overall though, I think in countries like here, where we have public health insurance, it's in our best interest to keep people in better health. Having a high obesity rate makes it more expensive for all of us when you're paying public health insurance (or when it comes out of taxes) and all money and costs are pooled together. I DO think the focus should be on health and not stuff like BMI though...some people are technically overweight and perfectly healthy, and that's fine.

Some people say stuff like "what about smoking, drinking a lot, and workaholics" when stuff like this is mentioned. I want to be clear that I think these are all also big problems (probably even bigger ones than weight), and it's best to reduce their prevalence in society.

I guess mostly this doesn't really apply to the US, as health care doesn't work the same way there.

[B. de Corbin]

Re: Why Do You Care About Someone Else's Appearance?

One of the really good things about working closely with large numbers of people over a fairly long period of time is that it becomes painfully obvious that whatever qualities one decides are "good" or "bad" have very little to do with the way a person looks - unless one is actually judging good and bad based on appearance.

Yes, some times something like a physical deformity can be startling at first, but once you get to know a person - really know them AS a person - the deformity fades quickly into the background and their actual personal qualities become foremost.

I don't think I judge people based on looks, at least not for very long. And learning to be "appearance blind" has improved my life, I'd say.

[Tylluan Penry]

Re: Why Do You Care About Someone Else's Appearance?

Really good point. I don't know the answer. I couldn't give a pair of foetid dingo's kidneys what people look like or their size. I'm sick and tired of people judging on what they think they know just by looking at other people. It's like when people say to me 'But your eyes look perfectly okay' and I ask them how in hell they can tell what's happening when they can't see the retina, optic nerve or blood cells.

I think it's all a question of trying to feel superior. I worked once in an office where several jibes were made about my weight (and I wasn't really all that overweight then) - none too subtle hints were being made about why I didn't go on a diet and in the end I ask why they didn't take some classes and study a bit.
'Why should I?' was the reply.
'Because you're stupid and thick and your stupidity offends me,' I answered.
That shut things up pretty damn quick. ;-)

[Ophidia]

I asked this in another thread, but it dawned on me that it would make a good debate topic all on its own.

Why do we care what other people look like? How much they weigh? If they wear fashionable clothing? If they are 'attractive'? What drives us to be so judgmental about another person's appearance? Why does it consume so much of our time and energy? Why do we have entire channels programmed around shows about appearance? Magazines? Industries?

Me, personally, I'm not appearance driven, but it is useful in distinguishing one individual from the rest of them. For one, I'm near-sighted and don't have any depth perception. Everything looks kind of flat to me. I never notice someone's new hair color or style unless it's a drastic change. I watch body language more than facial expressions because it's hard for me to look people directly in the eye (I've got a lazy eye. It wanders, and usually makes me look like I'm looking over someone's shoulder at rapidly approaching doom or something). I don't care about how much other people weigh beyond some vague sort of 'that can't be healthy' agreement when talking about someone who is either anorexic or like, half a ton being pulled out of their home with a backhoe. I'm fat, but I've been skinny, and I don't feel like skinny people or fat people are offensive. They are people who have little or no bearing upon my existence or who are involved in my life, and even if you're involved in my life then I don't care what you look like as long as you don't smell bad & aren't sick with something contagious. To me, variety makes people interesting. If someone has a truly unique feature, I will remember their name more likely than if they don't stick out. I work with a girl who has sort of a frog-like face. She's nice, cute, and I remember her name because I think to myself 'Frog-Face Michelle', differentiating her from 'Supervisor Michelle' and 'Cocktail Waitress Michelle'. If Supervisor Michelle put on a cocktail waitress uniform, I couldn't distinguish her from Cocktail Waitress Michelle. Frog-Face Michelle? I'd totally know her.

So it's weird to me, the caring if someone else looks a different way. Appearance, to me, isn't that important that I'd waste a huge amount of brain space on it. About the only part of it I 'get' is physical attraction. You can't always determine what you're going to find attractive. I also understand certain features setting off genetic compatibility alarms, indicators of good health, that kind of thing. Those are instincts coming from the alligator brain - I don't get where the judgmental attitudes are coming from.