Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

[Medusa]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

Oh, relevant!

[Girlgoyle]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

My position on this flip-flops over the years so I'll just take the constant portion and ignore the variables.

If you are an active and determined threat to my health or freedom or the health or freedom of those under my protection then I can and will use whatever means I see fit to resolve that threat up to and including brute force. It does not matter if you are male, female, neuter or a hermaphrodite, by making yourself a determined threat to something under my protection, you forfeit the normal protections afforded by my morality and honor.

If you are not a threat (regardless of whether you're trying to be a threat, you have to actually be one), then different rules apply. What the specific rules are changes based on who you are, how you're provoking me and my thought process upon the given year but you retain some protections from my conscience as long as I don't feel that you are an active and determined threat. I will also point out that I have other options than meeting blows in kind. I have very few qualms with pinning anyone and lecturing them on their bad manners. Pins and locks don't have to be followed up with injury but being stuck in one for an extended period is damned irritating and being stuck in one and listening to a 15 minute lecture on why one is a moron should hopefully discourage a repeat performance of the same idiocy.

This would be my take on it as well. I reserve physical force for my/my family's protection. If force is required to stop someone from hurting me/or mine I feel it is justified regardless of the individual. If it is not necessary to stop them from hurting you than it's not justified. If, in my opinion, a woman hits a man as the first act of a physical attack and is obviously bent on continuing by all means do whatever is necessary to make her stop hurting you even if it means punching her out. If you get into some bitchy argument and she slaps a man (which I think is absolutely unacceptable) hitting her back in retaliation is not justified. Same goes the other way..if I man hit me and I thought he would try to continue hurting me I would use whatever force necessary to try to make him stop. If he punched or slapped me and tried to run off I wouldn't chase him down to hit him back. I hate violence and whenever it can be avoided it should, in my opinion.

[Gleb]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

People shouldn't hit each other. If there are any other choices, any other way out of hitting someone else, do that instead.

But yeah, if someone hits you, and you have no other options available, hit them back.

I second this.

[thalassa]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

Proportional response. (Awesome episode of west wing too)

Regardless of gender.

[ChainLightning]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

A "right" to hit a woman. Huh.

A right to self defense, reasonable force and all that. But not a license to escalate domestic assault. That would be my take on it.

The moral conflict I have is actually the hitting, in the first place. There are too many variables that could be at play, there. A slap, a punch, a weapon, a misunderstanding of intent. What actually brought on the hit and what type of a hit.

[Shahaku]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

Oooo Can. Of. Worms.

Twice my brother has been in fucked up relationships. Seriously. He was raised "right". Never. Ever. Hit a woman. Didn't either. They'd smack him, punch him, one pushed him through a window. Took a bat to him while he was holding their infant daughter. Yeah. Any time he would shove her away, the cops would be called. Lay a finger on her, "I'm calling the cops!" He'd be bleeding, she might have a few bruises, and they'd take him to jail because it was domestic abuse and he was the one called on. They cops would leave their infant daughter with that abusive bitch and take my brother to jail. Never recorded a single scratch on him. I'm still pissed over this situation today. My brother has a domestic abuse charge on his name and only weekend visitations with his daughter because those idiots refused to believe that he was the one being abused and only defending himself. Last time he shoved her away from him she fell and hit a table. Had a nasty black eye and a bruise on her hip. That's what got him the charge. They don't care around here who does the abusing, if a man's evolved he better get the hell out of there because they will tack it on him.

Do I think a man has a right to retaliate? Hell yes. Does the law? It prolly depends on where you live and how corrupt the cops are.

[MaskedOne]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

Having read Goldberg's statement in the article, if her hypothetical 4' 3" woman actually merits me really trying to hurt them then either they are armed or that is one scary short person. That's about the size of some younger cousins of mine, it's not a case of I won't hit that example because they're female. It's a case of I won't hit them because I'm more than a foot and a half taller, probably 100 lbs heavier and know at least two different ways to restrain them indefinitely while I wait for them to calm down. Why the hell would I actually hit them?

[kalynraye]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

What I hate is the inequality when it comes to spousal abuse. Women abuse men. Wives abuse husbands. Women hit men. Women throw shit at men. Women fly into hysterics and yell and scream and hit and scratch and tear at people's hair. And they usually get away with it. But a man lays a finger on a woman? I dislike the double standards.

My mother has a pension for abusive relationships. I seriously think she craves them... The only one that wasn't abusive was with my dad and she cheated on him because they didn't have anything in common. My mother is a 5'11 amazonian, no kidding shes a fucking beast, and your right there are tons and tons of abusive women. My mother however is the one who gives punch for punch hit for hit, and then sticks around because they "need" her.

I do believe though if she lays a hand on you you have the right to defend yourself. Do what you have to do to protect you and yours. There are lots of crazy ones out there. What can I say men make us crazy (I'm kidding). I am of the mind though if a woman laid a hand on my brothers or my husband he wouldn't have to worry about defending himself because I would do it for him. Not because he can't but because regardless if she attacked first he would be the one to get in trouble.

I don't condone violence we have enough of it in this world but you have the right to protect you and yours.

[Hawkfeathers]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

If anybody hit me, I'd definitely hit them back. With a bullet.

[Gleb]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

I strongly believe that a person must defend him/herself without any connection to the gender of the attacker. Even if it's a family member. What's the point in enduring the pain caused by another person? Every person has a right to defend his/her body, loved ones and territory from in or out.

[Roknrol]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

If an adult hits me, I will hit them back. I do not care about their gender or their "reasoning". If I can go through my life without ever initiating a physical confrontation, then I expect other adults to know better as well. You hit me, I hit you. That's how it works.

"Otherwise provoked" means "not physical contact" which means NO, you do not get to "hit the person back". In order for something to be done "back" it must first be done - if the person hasn't struck you, YOU are the one initiating the physical contact.

I'm not sure why people make this more complicated than it needs to be.

Yes, people piss me off enough to want to hit them. Wanting doesn't cost anything and it doesn't DO anything, so want all you like. When that want turns to action, it has become "your fault".

[B. de Corbin]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

Depends on how effectual the hitting was.

If she knows what she's doing, yes.

If it's that flailing about, then no.

[Doc_Holliday]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

I agree, but of course the context of the hit, the force, the damage. They all matter. A girl giving a guy a angry punch that makes him feel a little sting on the shoulder and then she walks away? No. don't hit back. A girl knocking a guys jaw into orbit? Yeah.

- - - Updated - - -

Also the first lines of that "theroot" article are incredibly biased and short sighted, shes not defending domestic violence for gods sake. She advocating defense, but perhaps too loosely.

[ChainLightning]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

I just draw a line between what a man can take and what he has to do about it. Forget the times I deserved to be hit (and usually didn't get slapped or punched for my asshattedness, btw) but just taking into account that I can handle a fuck of a lot more pain than a good number of women can apply in a single hit, that is without the use of a weapon of some sort or some other serious advantage. The thing about that is, the same holds true with a good number of men, as well.

I know from experience that standing there, facing the threat, head-on, and not trying to instantly retaliate, I've actually avoided many a fight. Many. Fisticuffs are for the boxing ring. Fighting is just plain stupid, IMO. There's plenty of ways to subdue a threat without resorting to plain old brutality. Though, if a man, or woman, is trying to punch my nose out the back of my skull, their arms are forfeit. It is in that sense that hitting them back is fair game, I just have other means to make my point.



Also, the mention of this 4'3" woman? Hell, I'M even more than a foot taller than her. It doesn't make a lot of sense to me that someone would actually have to hit her back, ever. The damage would be disproportional, almost to the extreme. Like having to punch an 8 year old for hitting you. She's not really a threat, even on a good day, without something to even the score, the odds, the brutality, coming from her end of the fight. Like a gun. A knife. A ball bat. Seriously, the best defense against a tiny little woman like that is probably laughing at the ineffectual hits that her miniature swings land. Then putting her over your knee for a nice, healthy spanking, kind of thing.

[Rae'ya]

Re: Whoopi Goldberg: It's Your Right To Hit A Woman If She Hits You First

Twice my brother has been in fucked up relationships. Seriously. He was raised "right". Never. Ever. Hit a woman. Didn't either. They'd smack him, punch him, one pushed him through a window. Took a bat to him while he was holding their infant daughter. Yeah. Any time he would shove her away, the cops would be called. Lay a finger on her, "I'm calling the cops!" He'd be bleeding, she might have a few bruises, and they'd take him to jail because it was domestic abuse and he was the one called on. They cops would leave their infant daughter with that abusive bitch and take my brother to jail. Never recorded a single scratch on him. I'm still pissed over this situation today. My brother has a domestic abuse charge on his name and only weekend visitations with his daughter because those idiots refused to believe that he was the one being abused and only defending himself. Last time he shoved her away from him she fell and hit a table. Had a nasty black eye and a bruise on her hip. That's what got him the charge. They don't care around here who does the abusing, if a man's evolved he better get the hell out of there because they will tack it on him.

My uncle had almost the exact same thing happen to him.