Need help knowing where to go from here

[roedeer]

I figured this was probably the best place to put this.So after struggling with my relationship with Catholicism and 'God', I started coming to the conclusion that I don't believe in Him or at least I don't put my faith in Him. My friend and I were having discussions about religion, and she thought I had a very pagan/druid outlook on life, specifically that I care deeply about nature and want to care for all life. After giving it much thought, I realised that I tend to believe that everything has a spirit or a soul, rather than just us which is the implication the Abrahamic religions make. So one night, I said, to no one in particular. That I'm open to working with whoever wants me and that I'm willing to learn. Basically that I'm releasing myself at the anger I had for Yahweh and not holding it against everyone. That I believe in higher powers and just want a sign. So afterwards I went to sleep and I was falling asleep, the name Minerva kept ringing through my head. I literally couldn't shake it until I acknowledged it. Now I don't know if I'm reading too much into it, but her symbol is owls and for a while everything my mum would buy me was owl related. Is that possibly a sign she was trying to contact me or get my attention? Anyway my main thing is that I have no idea where to go from here. I'm "in the closet" to my parents so I'm not really able to be set up an altar. But I don't really understand the ways of working with a goddess or even if it is Minerva that was talking to me. My friend warned that now that I'm open other spirits may latch onto me. Any help would be appreciated and if you need anymore information I'm happy to give it. Sorry it's long, just a lot on my mind.

[Gleb]

Re: Need help knowing where to go from here

Looks like the goddess Minerva keeps you in her close ranged radar. Try talking with her, maybe something will happen. You don't need an altar to work with any deity. Try to do meditation one evening without being disturbed. Then try to focus on Minerva and talk to her.

Your parents don't have to know about it. It takes time to gain the courage to tell them.

[roedeer]

Re: Need help knowing where to go from here

Thanks Gleb for your reply. Would you recommend a specific type of meditation (like visualisation or what have you) or just focus on my breathing?

I do have to improve my meditation skills as I'm easily distracted. As I was saying to my friend I often feel there's something present with me trying to stop me from achieving successful attempts.

[LunarHarvest]

Re: Need help knowing where to go from here

I figured this was probably the best place to put this.So after struggling with my relationship with Catholicism and 'God', I started coming to the conclusion that I don't believe in Him or at least I don't put my faith in Him.

That I'm open to working with whoever wants me and that I'm willing to learn.

Keep this attitude and always try to remain open to changes in your path. You never know what is waiting ahead of you, or if another god/dess may try to communicate with you too.

I wish you the best of luck on your path, and I hope you are able to find the answers that you seek. :^^:

[Gleb]

Re: Need help knowing where to go from here

Thanks Gleb for your reply. Would you recommend a specific type of meditation (like visualisation or what have you) or just focus on my breathing?

I do have to improve my meditation skills as I'm easily distracted. As I was saying to my friend I often feel there's something present with me trying to stop me from achieving successful attempts.

I am not very much of the ordinary meditation type. I do specific moves instead that serve as a meditation of some sort. But try the breathing meditation. If you find it a bit hard, try to turn on calming music. It really helps, at least in my case. Try also this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLyjRUBvUcg , https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNBX7Ag2Wgc