Well, here goes...
So I was introduced to Paganism for the first time about 5-6 years ago, and was taught at least the basics of general paganism. The person who introduced me also became my teacher, so I didn't think twice about him. Problem is, there was a night I didn't feel right, and was told it was entirely normal... Just to find out a few days later, from who I found out was his teacher, that he was trying something he stumbled across about, using his words, "stealing gifts."
Obviously I initially chuckled at the thought, but it wasnt long before I noticed something was off... I could no longer feel anything. I couldn't cast, transfer energy of any sort, and haven't even been able to keep a steady meditation without suddenly getting the feeling of being jerked out of it... Its gotten better since my wife has been helping periodically, but theres only so much either of us can do. On the fortunate side, I do know who my guardian is, and a few gifts as well. However, as much as I can slightly sense that my guardian is there, that's as far as I can get in general. I've been trying to level myself out, for lack of better words.
So for the past 4 years, I've only learned some important details by having been read by trusted brothers and sisters. I just feel its time that I work towards everything myself. I just need to find where I go from here.
I'm just tired of being misled.
So I was introduced to Paganism for the first time about 5-6 years ago, and was taught at least the basics of general paganism. The person who introduced me also became my teacher, so I didn't think twice about him. Problem is, there was a night I didn't feel right, and was told it was entirely normal... Just to find out a few days later, from who I found out was his teacher, that he was trying something he stumbled across about, using his words, "stealing gifts."
Obviously I initially chuckled at the thought, but it wasnt long before I noticed something was off... I could no longer feel anything. I couldn't cast, transfer energy of any sort, and haven't even been able to keep a steady meditation without suddenly getting the feeling of being jerked out of it... Its gotten better since my wife has been helping periodically, but theres only so much either of us can do. On the fortunate side, I do know who my guardian is, and a few gifts as well. However, as much as I can slightly sense that my guardian is there, that's as far as I can get in general. I've been trying to level myself out, for lack of better words.
So for the past 4 years, I've only learned some important details by having been read by trusted brothers and sisters. I just feel its time that I work towards everything myself. I just need to find where I go from here.
I'm just tired of being misled.
as habbs said, follow your gut and you should be fine. People are generally nice and understanding on here, it's a good place for just finding your way.
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