Greetings,
To give some context, I am a 24 year old female. I did not have a religion growing up, as my mother came from a country where she could have been killed for practicing. I had to as a result come up with my own explanations spiritually as a young child. I can basically say my beliefs to this day are a mix of a variety of cultures, and ideas. I believe energy is everywhere, and I also find peace in the moral lessons of ancient stories. So of course, I delve into different pantheons and myths for answers. Then I took to reading about anything and everything. Science, history, music, and literature. I basically self educated myself in the humanities of old by the time I was in highschool at a college level. I knew quite a bit of Latin, and Greek. Eventually I picked up a few more common languages.
Now a few other things you need to know. I loved to read, and I loved singing. Music I had a strong affinity to, and my earliest happy childhood memories was singing at 2 years old for my mom like a parrot CDs she played. Apparently, I was quite apt for it, and memorized a few opera, and foreign pieces for talent shows as a kid. My father did not want me living my own life, but his. Mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer and fought it for 5 years. Weird stuff happened after she died when I was a preteen. Now I already had a few paranormal experiences I cannot explain. Such as seeing places, and being places i couldn't possibly know about, or be in sleep. I had seen ghosts from the 1800s as well as "talked" to a girl in CA over a barbie walkie talkie across the country. I also seemed to attract animals, and know if they needed something. Later in my teen years it became apparent I had some sort of -clair/intuitive abilities.
Now about the reading. While I was studying on my free time as a school aged child I would be shown in my head or rather hear internally that something was "true" "false" "right", "wrong", or otherwise to be noted for some important reason. The ideas would pop into my head. I later realized I was being guided by something older, and wiser than me. I could pull information from either what I read previous like Google, or from the ether. The Earth/Air literally has information stored in it. Most of the time, my soul, would pull information in sleep. Like a record hall, or other dimension. At one point, I even met a few of those wiser beings as part of my "soul mission" "sole reason for being incarnated on Earth this time". This would happen sporadically, and I would recall meeting my partner who could not incarnate at the time (we were genderless and in soul form) now it may seem like I was either mentally not there, or wishful thinking. But, I experienced it as if it were real. I remember the feelings, and thoughts even now.
So back to Apollo which was the real point of this thread in the first place. I never liked him as much as his sister Artemis. I recall reading about her talk with Zeus, and really idolizing her chastity, and embodiment of rebellion against female expectations. Plus the moon is pretty, and feminine to me. So anyhow, fast forward past me learning about the Egyption pantheon at 9-10 years old, then Greek, Roman, Norse ect. I now had graduated college without much of a hitch. Though my living situation with my father was less than ideal to put it mildly. I had years of traumatic exposure to his rages, and control tactics. I found comfort in my books to live a life I couldn't with him pulling the strings. Once I got into law school like he wanted, just to be hours away from him it started more intensely than even when my house would act weird.
I started to see corvids everywhere. Up until that point my mom in dove, or cat form would visit. So I started getting ominous vibes from it. Then I recalled Odin was known to use crows/ravens as messengers. He was a deity who respected knowledge. Okay. But, then I started seeing Apollo literally everywhere. His name plastered places, Sun gods mentioned everywhere, in art even in my stepbrother's room it's him on a puzzle with his lyre. Looked up his symbols thinking I'd see the lyre, laurel, and maybe dolphin. Nope turns out he had a myth that deals with corvids. SO LMAO he then visited me at one point in a dream before I put two and two together.
In the dream I see a bunch of attractive men, but I abstain myself from being enchanted by their beauty. I value knowledge, truth, music, not sex for the sake of itself. Eventually I am approached by this beautiful man with long blonde hair, and am instantly reminded of Baldr. But, that's not right either. He reaches out his hand as if to help me up from my position of kneeling. Then he said something, I still do not entirely understand. "There's just something about you". He smiles, I wake up shortly after confused, and forget it for a while. The serendipitous events kept happening, and shortened in lengths apart. My god. I was actually visited by a deity. Something unhuman, actually inhuman. Like in the stories. Then I looked up patron deities and it sort of led me to the term tiertary deity. I still don't completely get it, but I try my best to ask for his help, and offer him extra stuff like food in return. It just is funny to me, how he seemed bemused by me in the dream. Meanwhile, I kinda was hoping his sister would have took a liking to me. I don't know.
Advice, assistance, experience with this god, related stories?
To give some context, I am a 24 year old female. I did not have a religion growing up, as my mother came from a country where she could have been killed for practicing. I had to as a result come up with my own explanations spiritually as a young child. I can basically say my beliefs to this day are a mix of a variety of cultures, and ideas. I believe energy is everywhere, and I also find peace in the moral lessons of ancient stories. So of course, I delve into different pantheons and myths for answers. Then I took to reading about anything and everything. Science, history, music, and literature. I basically self educated myself in the humanities of old by the time I was in highschool at a college level. I knew quite a bit of Latin, and Greek. Eventually I picked up a few more common languages.
Now a few other things you need to know. I loved to read, and I loved singing. Music I had a strong affinity to, and my earliest happy childhood memories was singing at 2 years old for my mom like a parrot CDs she played. Apparently, I was quite apt for it, and memorized a few opera, and foreign pieces for talent shows as a kid. My father did not want me living my own life, but his. Mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer and fought it for 5 years. Weird stuff happened after she died when I was a preteen. Now I already had a few paranormal experiences I cannot explain. Such as seeing places, and being places i couldn't possibly know about, or be in sleep. I had seen ghosts from the 1800s as well as "talked" to a girl in CA over a barbie walkie talkie across the country. I also seemed to attract animals, and know if they needed something. Later in my teen years it became apparent I had some sort of -clair/intuitive abilities.
Now about the reading. While I was studying on my free time as a school aged child I would be shown in my head or rather hear internally that something was "true" "false" "right", "wrong", or otherwise to be noted for some important reason. The ideas would pop into my head. I later realized I was being guided by something older, and wiser than me. I could pull information from either what I read previous like Google, or from the ether. The Earth/Air literally has information stored in it. Most of the time, my soul, would pull information in sleep. Like a record hall, or other dimension. At one point, I even met a few of those wiser beings as part of my "soul mission" "sole reason for being incarnated on Earth this time". This would happen sporadically, and I would recall meeting my partner who could not incarnate at the time (we were genderless and in soul form) now it may seem like I was either mentally not there, or wishful thinking. But, I experienced it as if it were real. I remember the feelings, and thoughts even now.
So back to Apollo which was the real point of this thread in the first place. I never liked him as much as his sister Artemis. I recall reading about her talk with Zeus, and really idolizing her chastity, and embodiment of rebellion against female expectations. Plus the moon is pretty, and feminine to me. So anyhow, fast forward past me learning about the Egyption pantheon at 9-10 years old, then Greek, Roman, Norse ect. I now had graduated college without much of a hitch. Though my living situation with my father was less than ideal to put it mildly. I had years of traumatic exposure to his rages, and control tactics. I found comfort in my books to live a life I couldn't with him pulling the strings. Once I got into law school like he wanted, just to be hours away from him it started more intensely than even when my house would act weird.
I started to see corvids everywhere. Up until that point my mom in dove, or cat form would visit. So I started getting ominous vibes from it. Then I recalled Odin was known to use crows/ravens as messengers. He was a deity who respected knowledge. Okay. But, then I started seeing Apollo literally everywhere. His name plastered places, Sun gods mentioned everywhere, in art even in my stepbrother's room it's him on a puzzle with his lyre. Looked up his symbols thinking I'd see the lyre, laurel, and maybe dolphin. Nope turns out he had a myth that deals with corvids. SO LMAO he then visited me at one point in a dream before I put two and two together.
In the dream I see a bunch of attractive men, but I abstain myself from being enchanted by their beauty. I value knowledge, truth, music, not sex for the sake of itself. Eventually I am approached by this beautiful man with long blonde hair, and am instantly reminded of Baldr. But, that's not right either. He reaches out his hand as if to help me up from my position of kneeling. Then he said something, I still do not entirely understand. "There's just something about you". He smiles, I wake up shortly after confused, and forget it for a while. The serendipitous events kept happening, and shortened in lengths apart. My god. I was actually visited by a deity. Something unhuman, actually inhuman. Like in the stories. Then I looked up patron deities and it sort of led me to the term tiertary deity. I still don't completely get it, but I try my best to ask for his help, and offer him extra stuff like food in return. It just is funny to me, how he seemed bemused by me in the dream. Meanwhile, I kinda was hoping his sister would have took a liking to me. I don't know.
Advice, assistance, experience with this god, related stories?
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