I am pro-choice. Not because I "believe in abortion" (whatever the hell that is supposed to mean), but because I know enough about history to know that making abortion illegal hurts women and hurts families (take the time to read about Romania's maternal mortality rates under Ceausescu). I am pro-choice because I know enough about the politics and history of religion to know that "life begins at conception" is a modern invention of conservative evangelicals and did not become part of mainstream Protestant faith until the late 1970s/ early 1980s. Because I know enough about the Constitution to know that a law based on a politician's religious teachings that tells women what can or cannot be done to their bodies is legislating religion, and a blatant violation of the 1st Amendment. Because I know enough about biostatistics and public policy to know that if you really want there to be less abortion, making abortion legal, contraception free, and actual sex education standard works better than any law. Because I know enough about developmental biology to know what a crock of shit the "logic" behind anti-choice, anti-women, pro-birther legislation is (see, I can place that little lingo game too).




But most of all, I'm pro-choice, because I'm a mother. Because no woman's womb should be held hostage for someone else's morality. Not my daughter, should she ever have the tragic misfortune of getting raped (considering the statistics, it is sadly not out of the realm of possibility); not myself--hey, I'm done having kids and while my method of birth control is remarkably good, shit happens--the hubby and I made a commitment our two wonderful children that we've replaced ourselves and we are showing some ecological restraint and calling it quits (he's getting the big snip once he's hit the prostate cancer rate goes down age); not my long ago roomie from a fundie family with a brand new career and pile of student debt who just found out the boyfriend was married; not any woman. No woman should be forced to give birth, ever.




And I get it, the sanctimonious Morality Police just want to make sure we all do the right thing. But it would be more believable the rest of their morality actually reflected the moniker of pro-life. After all, Ecclesiastes says that the most fortunate are those that are never born, for they have not seen the evil done...




And (since I am happily NOT a Christian) as I define evil as a conscious lapse in empathy when making decisions that affect others, I can think of few things as evil as the real pain that anti-abortion laws cause families like this one:




(source)



I have had a stillborn child. It was my first pregnancy. I felt the baby move in the morning, and by my afternoon OB appointment, they couldn't find a heartbeat. Two days later, drugged up on morphine, labor was induced. It's a slow process at 26 weeks. With a hospital room stuffed to the gills with 9-month post-deployment couples, there wasn't anyone to deliver the baby when it finally came out. Hubby and I sat with a dead baby in my lap for a good 20 minutes before anyone checked on me...I wouldn't let him leave, and he was afraid to leave me alone. Our roommate had been trying unsuccessfully to get a nurse to come in and check on me since my water had broken, but was told "oh, she's not actually ready to deliver yet" and even "well, we are busy, we have live babies to deliver right now".

I have had a miscarriage. It was my third pregnancy. It happened on my birthday, about four weeks after the pregnancy test was positive. Thank goodness. It was only about 6 months after I'd had Chickadee, and I was on the breastfeeding progesterone-only pill.